第 13 节
作者:寻找山吹      更新:2022-04-27 10:15      字数:9322
  Where the fever…demon strews
  Poison with the falling dews;
  Where the sickly sunbeams glare
  Through the hot and misty air:
  Gone; gone; sold and gone
  To the rice swamp dank and lone;
  From Virginia hills and waters
  Woe is me; my stolen daughters!〃
  The hearth is desolate。  The children; the uncon…
  scious children; who once sang and danced in her
  presence; are gone。  She gropes her way; in the dark…
  ness of age; for a drink of water。  Instead of the voices
  of her children; she hears by day the moans of the
  dove; and by night the screams of the hideous owl。
  All is gloom。  The grave is at the door。  And now;
  when weighed down by the pains and aches of old
  age; when the head inclines to the feet; when the
  beginning and ending of human existence meet; and
  helpless infancy and painful old age combine to…
  getherat this time; this most needful time; the time
  for the exercise of that tenderness and affection
  which children only can exercise towards a declining
  parentmy poor old grandmother; the devoted
  mother of twelve children; is left all alone; in yonder
  little hut; before a few dim embers。  She stands
  she sitsshe staggersshe fallsshe groansshe dies
  and there are none of her children or grandchildren
  present; to wipe from her wrinkled brow the cold
  sweat of death; or to place beneath the sod her
  fallen remains。  Will not a righteous God visit for
  these things?
  In about two years after the death of Mrs。 Lu…
  cretia; Master Thomas married his second wife。  Her
  name was Rowena Hamilton。  She was the eldest
  daughter of Mr。 William Hamilton。  Master now
  lived in St。 Michael's。  Not long after his marriage;
  a misunderstanding took place between himself and
  Master Hugh; and as a means of punishing his
  brother; he took me from him to live with himself
  at St。 Michael's。  Here I underwent another most
  painful separation。  It; however; was not so severe
  as the one I dreaded at the division of property; for;
  during this interval; a great change had taken place
  in Master Hugh and his once kind and affectionate
  wife。  The influence of brandy upon him; and of
  slavery upon her; had effected a disastrous change
  in the characters of both; so that; as far as they
  were concerned; I thought I had little to lose by the
  change。  But it was not to them that I was attached。
  It was to those little Baltimore boys that I felt the
  strongest attachment。  I had received many good
  lessons from them; and was still receiving them; and
  the thought of leaving them was painful indeed。  I
  was leaving; too; without the hope of ever being
  allowed to return。  Master Thomas had said he would
  never let me return again。  The barrier betwixt him…
  self and brother he considered impassable。
  I then had to regret that I did not at least make
  the attempt to carry out my resolution to run away;
  for the chances of success are tenfold greater from
  the city than from the country。
  I sailed from Baltimore for St。 Michael's in the
  sloop Amanda; Captain Edward Dodson。  On my
  passage; I paid particular attention to the direction
  which the steamboats took to go to Philadelphia。  I
  found; instead of going down; on reaching North
  Point they went up the bay; in a north…easterly direc…
  tion。  I deemed this knowledge of the utmost im…
  portance。  My determination to run away was again
  revived。  I resolved to wait only so long as the offering
  of a favorable opportunity。  When that came; I was
  determined to be off。
  CHAPTER IX
  I have now reached a period of my life when I
  can give dates。  I left Baltimore; and went to live
  with Master Thomas Auld; at St。 Michael's; in
  March; 1832。  It was now more than seven years
  since I lived with him in the family of my old mas…
  ter; on Colonel Lloyd's plantation。  We of course
  were now almost entire strangers to each other。  He
  was to me a new master; and I to him a new slave。
  I was ignorant of his temper and disposition; he
  was equally so of mine。  A very short time; however;
  brought us into full acquaintance with each other。
  I was made acquainted with his wife not less than
  with himself。  They were well matched; being equally
  mean and cruel。  I was now; for the first time during
  a space of more than seven years; made to feel the
  painful gnawings of hungera something which I
  had not experienced before since I left Colonel
  Lloyd's plantation。  It went hard enough with me
  then; when I could look back to no period at which
  I had enjoyed a sufficiency。  It was tenfold harder
  after living in Master Hugh's family; where I had
  always had enough to eat; and of that which was
  good。  I have said Master Thomas was a mean man。
  He was so。  Not to give a slave enough to eat; is
  regarded as the most aggravated development of
  meanness even among slaveholders。  The rule is; no
  matter how coarse the food; only let there be enough
  of it。  This is the theory; and in the part of Maryland
  from which I came; it is the general practice;though
  there are many exceptions。  Master Thomas gave us
  enough of neither coarse nor fine food。  There were
  four slaves of us in the kitchenmy sister Eliza; my
  aunt Priscilla; Henny; and myself; and we were al…
  lowed less than a half of a bushel of corn…meal per
  week; and very little else; either in the shape of
  meat or vegetables。  It was not enough for us to
  subsist upon。  We were therefore reduced to the
  wretched necessity of living at the expense of our
  neighbors。  This we did by begging and stealing;
  whichever came handy in the time of need; the one
  being considered as legitimate as the other。  A great
  many times have we poor creatures been nearly
  perishing with hunger; when food in abundance lay
  mouldering in the safe and smoke…house; and our
  pious mistress was aware of the fact; and yet that
  mistress and her husband would kneel every morn…
  ing; and pray that God would bless them in basket
  and store!
  Bad as all slaveholders are; we seldom meet one
  destitute of every element of character commanding
  respect。  My master was one of this rare sort。  I do
  not know of one single noble act ever performed by
  him。  The leading trait in his character was mean…
  ness; and if there were any other element in his
  nature; it was made subject to this。  He was mean;
  and; like most other mean men; he lacked the ability
  to conceal his meanness。  Captain Auld was not born
  a slaveholder。  He had been a poor man; master only
  of a Bay craft。  He came into possession of all his
  slaves by marriage; and of all men; adopted slave…
  holders are the worst。  He was cruel; but cowardly。
  He commanded without firmness。  In the enforce…
  ment of his rules; he was at times rigid; and at times
  lax。  At times; he spoke to his slaves with the firmness
  of Napoleon and the fury of a demon; at other times;
  he might well be mistaken for an inquirer who had
  lost his way。  He did nothing of himself。  He might
  have passed for a lion; but for his ears。  In all things
  noble which he attempted; his own meanness shone
  most conspicuous。  His airs; words; and actions;
  were the airs; words; and actions of born slave…
  holders; and; being assumed; were awkward enough。
  He was not even a good imitator。  He possessed all
  the disposition to deceive; but wanted the power。
  Having no resources within himself; he was com…
  pelled to be the copyist of many; and being such; he
  was forever the victim of inconsistency; and of con…
  sequence he was an object of contempt; and was held
  as such even by his slaves。  The luxury of having
  slaves of his own to wait upon him was something
  new and unprepared for。  He was a slaveholder with…
  out the ability to hold slaves。  He found himself in…
  capable of managing his slaves either by force; fear;
  or fraud。  We seldom called him 〃master;〃 we gen…
  erally called him 〃Captain Auld;〃 and were hardly
  disposed to title him at all。  I doubt not that our
  conduct had much to do with making him appear
  awkward; and of consequence fretful。  Our want of
  reverence for him must have perplexed him greatly。
  He wished to have us call him master; but lacked
  the firmness necessary to command us to do so。  His
  wife used to insist upon our calling him so; but to
  no purpose。  In August; 1832; my master attended a
  Methodist camp…meeting held in the Bay…side; Tal…
  bot county; and there experienced religion。  I in…
  dulged a faint hope that his conversion would lead
  him to emancipate his slaves; and that; if he did not
  do this; it would; at any rate; make him more kind
  and humane。  I was disappointed in both these re…
  spects。  It neither made him to be humane to his
  slaves; nor to emancipate them。  If it had any effect
  on his character; it made him more cruel and hateful
  in all his ways; for I believe him to have been a much
  worse man after his conversio