第 12 节
作者:寻找山吹      更新:2022-04-27 10:15      字数:9322
  piece for the larboard side forward; would be marked
  thus〃L。 F。〃  When a piece was for starboard side
  forward; it would be marked thus〃S。 F。〃  For lar…
  board aft; it would be marked thus〃L。 A。〃  For star…
  board aft; it would be marked thus〃S。 A。〃  I soon
  learned the names of these letters; and for what
  they were intended when placed upon a piece of
  timber in the ship…yard。  I immediately commenced
  copying them; and in a short time was able to make
  the four letters named。  After that; when I met with
  any boy who I knew could write; I would tell him
  I could write as well as he。  The next word would be;
  〃I don't believe you。  Let me see you try it。〃  I would
  then make the letters which I had been so fortunate
  as to learn; and ask him to beat that。  In this way I
  got a good many lessons in writing; which it is quite
  possible I should never have gotten in any other way。
  During this time; my copy…book was the board fence;
  brick wall; and pavement; my pen and ink was a
  lump of chalk。  With these; I learned mainly how to
  write。  I then commenced and continued copying the
  Italics in Webster's Spelling Book; until I could make
  them all without looking on the book。  By this time;
  my little Master Thomas had gone to school; and
  learned how to write; and had written over a number
  of copy…books。  These had been brought home; and
  shown to some of our near neighbors; and then laid
  aside。  My mistress used to go to class meeting at
  the Wilk Street meetinghouse every Monday after…
  noon; and leave me to take care of the house。  When
  left thus; I used to spend the time in writing in the
  spaces left in Master Thomas's copy…book; copying
  what he had written。  I continued to do this until I
  could write a hand very similar to that of Master
  Thomas。  Thus; after a long; tedious effort for years;
  I finally succeeded in learning how to write。
  CHAPTER VIII
  In a very short time after I went to live at Balti…
  more; my old master's youngest son Richard died;
  and in about three years and six months after his
  death; my old master; Captain Anthony; died; leav…
  only his son; Andrew; and daughter; Lucretia; to
  share his estate。  He died while on a visit to see his
  daughter at Hillsborough。  Cut off thus unexpectedly;
  he left no will as to the disposal of his property。  It
  was therefore necessary to have a valuation of the
  property; that it might be equally divided between
  Mrs。 Lucretia and Master Andrew。  I was immedi…
  ately sent for; to be valued with the other property。
  Here again my feelings rose up in detestation of
  slavery。  I had now a new conception of my degraded
  condition。  Prior to this; I had become; if not in…
  sensible to my lot; at least partly so。  I left Baltimore
  with a young heart overborne with sadness; and a
  soul full of apprehension。  I took passage with Cap…
  tain Rowe; in the schooner Wild Cat; and; after a
  sail of about twenty…four hours; I found myself near
  the place of my birth。  I had now been absent from
  it almost; if not quite; five years。  I; however; re…
  membered the place very well。  I was only about
  five years old when I left it; to go and live with my
  old master on Colonel Lloyd's plantation; so that
  I was now between ten and eleven years old。
  We were all ranked together at the valuation。  Men
  and women; old and young; married and single; were
  ranked with horses; sheep; and swine。  There were
  horses and men; cattle and women; pigs and chil…
  dren; all holding the same rank in the scale of being;
  and were all subjected to the same narrow examina…
  tion。  Silvery…headed age and sprightly youth; maids
  and matrons; had to undergo the same indelicate
  inspection。  At this moment; I saw more clearly than
  ever the brutalizing effects of slavery upon both
  slave and slaveholder。
  After the valuation; then came the division。  I have
  no language to express the high excitement and deep
  anxiety which were felt among us poor slaves during
  this time。  Our fate for life was now to be decided。
  we had no more voice in that decision than the
  brutes among whom we were ranked。  A single word
  from the white men was enoughagainst all our
  wishes; prayers; and entreatiesto sunder forever the
  dearest friends; dearest kindred; and strongest ties
  known to human beings。  In addition to the pain of
  separation; there was the horrid dread of falling into
  the hands of Master Andrew。  He was known to us
  all as being a most cruel wretch;a common drunk…
  ard; who had; by his reckless mismanagement and
  profligate dissipation; already wasted a large por…
  tion of his father's property。  We all felt that we
  might as well be sold at once to the Georgia traders;
  as to pass into his hands; for we knew that that
  would be our inevitable condition;a condition held
  by us all in the utmost horror and dread。
  I suffered more anxiety than most of my fellow…
  slaves。  I had known what it was to be kindly treated;
  they had known nothing of the kind。  They had seen
  little or nothing of the world。  They were in very
  deed men and women of sorrow; and acquainted with
  grief。  Their backs had been made familiar with the
  bloody lash; so that they had become callous; mine
  was yet tender; for while at Baltimore I got few whip…
  pings; and few slaves could boast of a kinder master
  and mistress than myself; and the thought of pass…
  ing out of their hands into those of Master Andrew
  a man who; but a few days before; to give me a
  sample of his bloody disposition; took my little
  brother by the throat; threw him on the ground; and
  with the heel of his boot stamped upon his head
  till the blood gushed from his nose and earswas
  well calculated to make me anxious as to my fate。
  After he had committed this savage outrage upon
  my brother; he turned to me; and said that was the
  way he meant to serve me one of these days;mean…
  ing; I suppose; when I came into his possession。
  Thanks to a kind Providence; I fell to the portion
  of Mrs。 Lucretia; and was sent immediately back
  to Baltimore; to live again in the family of Master
  Hugh。  Their joy at my return equalled their sorrow
  at my departure。  It was a glad day to me。  I had
  escaped a worse than lion's jaws。  I was absent from
  Baltimore; for the purpose of valuation and division;
  just about one month; and it seemed to have been
  six。
  Very soon after my return to Baltimore; my mis…
  tress; Lucretia; died; leaving her husband and one
  child; Amanda; and in a very short time after her
  death; Master Andrew died。  Now all the property
  of my old master; slaves included; was in the hands
  of strangers;strangers who had had nothing to do
  with accumulating it。  Not a slave was left free。  All
  remained slaves; from the youngest to the oldest。  If
  any one thing in my experience; more than another;
  served to deepen my conviction of the infernal char…
  acter of slavery; and to fill me with unutterable
  loathing of slaveholders; it was their base ingrati…
  tude to my poor old grandmother。  She had served
  my old master faithfully from youth to old age。  She
  had been the source of all his wealth; she had peo…
  pled his plantation with slaves; she had become a
  great grandmother in his service。  She had rocked
  him in infancy; attended him in childhood; served
  him through life; and at his death wiped from his
  icy brow the cold death…sweat; and closed his eyes
  forever。  She was nevertheless left a slavea slave for
  lifea slave in the hands of strangers; and in their
  hands she saw her children; her grandchildren; and
  her great…grandchildren; divided; like so many sheep;
  without being gratified with the small privilege of a
  single word; as to their or her own destiny。  And; to
  cap the climax of their base ingratitude and fiendish
  barbarity; my grandmother; who was now very old;
  having outlived my old master and all his children;
  having seen the beginning and end of all of them;
  and her present owners finding she was of but little
  value; her frame already racked with the pains of old
  age; and complete helplessness fast stealing over her
  once active limbs; they took her to the woods; built
  her a little hut; put up a little mud…chimney; and
  then made her welcome to the privilege of support…
  ing herself there in perfect loneliness; thus virtually
  turning her out to die!  If my poor old grandmother
  now lives; she lives to suffer in utter loneliness; she
  lives to remember and mourn over the loss of chil…
  dren; the loss of grandchildren; and the loss of great…
  grandchildren。  They are; in the language of the
  slave's poet; Whittier;
  〃Gone; gone; sold and gone
  To the rice swamp dank and lone;
  Where the slave…whip ceaseless swings;
  Where the noisome insect stings;
  Where the fever…demon strews
  Poison with the falling dews;
  Where the sickly sunbeams glare
  Through t