第 4 节
作者:莫再讲      更新:2021-04-30 17:12      字数:9322
  six hours; repairing boiler…tap; 18s。; material; 2d。; total 18s。 2d。〃
  He took a dislike to the cook from the very first。               We did not blame
  him for this。      She was a disagreeable old woman; and we did not think
  much   of   her   ourselves。     But   when   it   came   to   keeping   her   out   of   the
  kitchen; so that she could not do her work; and my aunt and uncle had to
  cook the dinner themselves; assisted by the housemaida willing…enough
  girl;   but   necessarily   inexperiencedwe   felt   that   the   woman   was   being
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  subject to persecution。
  My uncle; after this; decided that the dog's training must be no longer
  neglected。      The man next door but one always talked as if he knew a lot
  about sporting matters; and to him my uncle went for advice as to how to
  set about it。
  〃Oh; yes;〃 said the man; cheerfully; 〃very simple thing; training a bull…
  dog。     Wants patience; that's all。〃
  〃Oh; that will be all right;〃 said my uncle; 〃it can't want much more
  than living in the same house with him before he's trained does。                 How do
  you start?〃
  〃Well; I'll tell you;〃 said next…door…but…one。          〃You take him up into a
  room where there's not much furniture; and you shut the door and bolt it。〃
  〃I see;〃 said my uncle。
  〃Then you place him on the floor in the middle of the room; and you
  go down on your knees in front of him; and begin to irritate him。〃
  〃Oh!〃
  〃Yesand   you   go   on   irritating   him   until   you   have   made   him   quite
  savage。〃
  〃Which; from what I know of the dog; won't take long;〃 observed my
  uncle thoughtfully。
  〃So much the better。        The moment he gets savage he will fly at you。〃
  My uncle agreed that the idea seemed plausible。
  〃He   will   fly   at   your   throat;〃   continued   the   next…door…but…one   man;
  〃and this is where you will have to be careful。              _As_ he springs toward
  you;   and   _before_   he   gets   hold   of   you;   you   must   hit   him  a   fair   straight
  blow on his nose; and knock him down。〃
  〃Yes; I see what you mean。〃
  〃Quite   sowell;   the   moment   you   have   knocked   him   down;   he   will
  jump up and go for you again。          You must knock him down again; and you
  must keep on doing this; until the dog is thoroughly cowed and exhausted。
  Once he is thoroughly cowed; the thing's donedog's as gentle as a lamb
  after that。〃
  〃Oh!〃 says my uncle; rising from his chair; 〃you think that a good way;
  do you?〃
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  〃Certainly;〃 replied the next…door…but…one man; 〃it never fails。〃
  〃Oh!     I wasn't doubting it;〃 said my uncle; 〃only it's just occurred to
  me that as you understand the knack of these things; perhaps _you'd_ like
  to come in and   try _your_ hand on   the dog?              We can   give you a  room
  quite to yourselves; and I'll undertake that nobody comes near to interfere
  with     you。      And      ifif;〃  continued      my    uncle;     with    that   kindly
  thoughtfulness which ever distinguished his treatment of others; 〃_if_; by
  any chance; you should miss hitting the dog at the proper critical moment;
  or; if _you_ should get cowed and exhausted first; instead of the dogwhy;
  I   shall  only   be   too  pleased    to  take   the  whole    burden     of  the  funeral
  expenses on my own shoulders; and I hope you know me well enough to
  feel   sure   that   the   arrangements   will   be   tasteful;   and;   at   the   same   time;
  unostentatious!〃
  And out my uncle walked。
  We next consulted the butcher; who agreed that the prize…ring method
  was    absurd;    especially    when    recommended        to  a  short…winded;     elderly
  family man; and who recommended; instead; plenty of out…door exercise
  for the dog; under my uncle's strict supervision and control。
  〃Get a fairly long chain for him;〃 said the butcher; 〃and take him out
  for   a   good   stiff   run   every   evening。 Never   let   him   get   away   from   you;
  make him  mind you; and   bring him home always thoroughly  exhausted。
  You stick to that for a month or two; regular; and you'll have him like a
  little child。〃
  〃Um!seems   to   me   that   I'm  going   to   get   more   training   over   his   job
  than anybody else;〃 muttered my uncle; as he thanked the man and left the
  shop; 〃but I suppose it's got to be done。            Wish I'd never had the d… dog
  now!〃
  So; religiously; every evening; my uncle would fasten a long chain to
  that poor dog; and drag him away from his happy home with the idea of
  exhausting him; and the dog would come back as fresh as paint; my uncle
  behind him; panting and clamoring for brandy。
  My uncle said   he   should never have   dreamed   there could have   been
  such stirring   times   in   this   prosaic   nineteenth   century  as   he   had;   training
  that dog。
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  Oh;   the   wild;   wild   scamperings   over   the   breezy   commonthe   dog
  trying    to  catch    a  swallow;    and   my    uncle;   unable    to  hold    him   back;
  following at the other end of the chain!
  Oh; the merry frolics in the fields; when the dog wanted to kill a cow;
  and the cow wanted to kill the dog; and they each dodged round my uncle;
  trying to do it!
  And; oh; the pleasant chats with the old ladies when the dog wound the
  chain into a knot around their legs; and upset them; and my uncle had to
  sit down in the road beside them; and untie them before they could get up
  again!
  But   a   crisis   came   at   last。 It   was   a   Saturday   afternoonuncle   being
  exercised by dog in usual waynervous children playing in road; see dog;
  scream;  and   runplayful   young dog   thinks   it a   game;  jerks   chain   out   of
  uncle's grasp; and flies after themuncle flies after dog; calling it names
  fond parent in front garden; seeing beloved children chased by savage dog;
  followed      by   careless   owner;    flies  after   uncle;   calling   _him_     names
  householders come to doors and cry; 〃Shame!〃also throw things at dog
  things don't hit dog; hit unclethings that don't hit uncle; hit fond parent
  through the village and up the hill; over the bridge and round by the green…
  …grand run; mile and a half without a break!                Children sink exhausted
  dog gambols up among themchildren go into fitsfond parent and uncle
  come up together; both breathless。
  〃Why don't you call your dog off; you wicked old man?〃
  〃Because I can't recollect his name; you old fool; you!〃
  Fond   parent   accuses   uncle   of   having   set   dog   onuncle;   indignant;
  reviles fond parentexasperated fond parent attacks uncleuncle retaliates
  with umbrellafaithful dog comes to assistance of uncle; and inflicts great
  injury   on    fond   parentarrival    of   policedog    attacks    policeuncle    and
  fond parent both taken into custodyuncle fined five pounds and costs for
  keeping   a   ferocious   dog   at   largeuncle   fined   five   pounds   and   costs   for
  assault   on   fond   parentuncle   fined   five   pounds   and   cost   for   assault   on
  police!
  My uncle gave the dog away soon after that。                 He did not waste him。
  He gave him as a wedding…present to a near relation。
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  But the saddest story I ever heard in connection with a bull…dog; was
  one told by my aunt herself。
  Now you can rely upon this story; because it is not one of mine; it is
  one of my aunt's; and she would scorn to tell a lie。               This is a story you
  could tell to the heathen; and feel that you were teaching them the truth
  and doing them good。          They give this story out at all the Sunday…schools
  in our part of the country; and draw moral lessons from it。                 It is a story
  that a little child can believe。
  It happened in the old crinoline days。           My aunt; who was then living
  in a country…town; had gone out shopping one morning; and was standing
  in the High Street; talking to a lady friend; a Mrs。 Gumworthy; the doctor's
  wife。    She (my aunt) had on a new crinoline that morning; in which; to
  use her own expression; she rather fancied herself。             It was a tremendously
  big one; as stiff as a wire…fence; and it 〃set〃 beautifully。
  They   were   standing   in   front   of   Jenki