第 34 节
作者:冬恋      更新:2021-04-30 17:00      字数:9322
  THE HOUSE BEHIND THE CEDARS
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  XIX
  GOD MADE US ALL
  Rena   was   convalescent   from  a   two…weeks'   illness   when   her   brother
  came to see her。      He arrived at Patesville by an early morning train before
  the   town    was   awake;    and   walked    unnoticed    from    the  station  to  his
  mother's house。      His meeting with his sister was not without emotion: he
  embraced her tenderly; and Rena became for a few minutes a very Niobe
  of grief。
  〃Oh; it was cruel; cruel!〃 she sobbed。        〃I shall never get over it。〃
  〃I know it; my dear;〃 replied Warwick soothingly;〃I know it; and I'm
  to blame for it。    If I had never taken you away from here; you would have
  escaped     this  painful   experience。    But    do  not   despair;   all  is  not  lost。
  Tryon will not marry you; as I hoped he might; while I feared the contrary;
  but he is a gentleman; and will be silent。        Come back and try again。〃
  〃No; John。     I couldn't go through it a second time。          I managed very
  well   before;   when   I   thought   our   secret   was   unknown;   but   now   I   could
  never be sure。      It would be borne on every wind; for aught I knew; and
  every rustling leaf might whisper it。         The law; you said; made us white;
  but not the law; nor even love; can conquer prejudice。              HE spoke of my
  beauty; my grace; my sweetness!          I looked into his eyes and believed him。
  And yet he left me without a word!            What would I do in Clarence now?
  I   came   away  engaged   to   be   married;   with   even   the day  set;   I should go
  back forsaken and discredited; even the servants would pity me。〃
  〃Little   Albert   is  pining  for  you;〃   suggested    Warwick。     〃We    could
  make some explanation that would spare your feelings。〃
  〃Ah; do not tempt me; John!         I love the child; and am grieved to leave
  him。    I'm grateful; too; John; for what you have done for me。              I am not
  sorry    that  I  tried  it。 It  opened    my   eyes;   and   I  would   rather  die  of
  knowledge than live in ignorance。           But I could not go through it again;
  John; I am not strong enough。         I could do you no good; I have made you
  trouble enough already。        Get a mother for AlbertMrs。 Newberry would
  marry  you;   secret   and   all;   and   would   be   good   to   the   child。 Forget   me;
  John; and take care of yourself。         Your friend has found you out through
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  mehe   may   have   told   a   dozen   people。     You   think   he   will   be   silent;I
  thought he loved me; and he left me without a word; and with a look that
  told me how he hated and despised me。                 I would not have believed it
  even of a white man。〃
  〃You do him an injustice;〃 said her brother; producing Tryon's letter。
  〃He did not get off unscathed。          He sent you a message。〃
  She turned her face away; but listened while he read the letter。 〃He did
  not love me;〃 she cried angrily; when he had finished; 〃or he would not
  have cast me   offhe would   not have   looked at   me so。             The law   would
  have let him  marry  me。         I seemed   as white   as he did。        He   might   have
  gone anywhere with me; and no one would have stared at us curiously; no
  one   need   have   known。       The   world   is   widethere   must   be   some   place
  where a man could live happily with the woman he loved。〃
  〃Yes; Rena; there is; and the world is wide enough for you to get along
  without Tryon。〃
  〃For a day or two;〃 she went on; 〃I hoped he might come back。                      But
  his expression in that awful moment grew upon me; haunted me day and
  night;   until   I   shuddered   at   the   thought   that   I   might   ever   see   him   again。
  He looked at me as though I were not even a human being。                    I do not love
  him any longer; John; I would not marry him if I were white; or he were as
  I   am。   He   did    not   love   meor   he   would   have   acted   differently。    He
  might have loved me and have left mehe could not have loved me and
  have looked at me so!〃
  She    was    weeping     hysterically。    There     was   little  he  could    say   to
  comfort   her。     Presently   she   dried   her   tears。  Warwick   was   reluctant   to
  leave     her   in  Patesville。     Her    childish    happiness     had    been    that  of
  ignorance;   she   could   never   be   happy   there   again。    She   had   flowered   in
  the sunlight; she must not pine away in the shade。
  〃If you won't come back with me; Rena; I'll send you to some school
  at   the  North;    where    you   can   acquire   a  liberal   education;    and   prepare
  yourself for some career of usefulness。            You may marry a better man than
  even Tryon。〃
  〃No;〃   she   replied   firmly;   〃I   shall   never   marry   any   man;   and   I'll   not
  leave mother again。        God is against it; I'll stay with my own people。〃
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  〃God has nothing to do with it;〃 retorted Warwick。                〃God is too often
  a convenient stalking… horse for human selfishness。                  If there is anything
  to be done; so unjust; so despicable; so wicked that human reason revolts
  at   it;   there   is   always   some   smug   hypocrite   to   exclaim;   ‘It   is   the   will   of
  God。'〃
  〃God   made   us   all;〃   continued   Rena   dreamily;   〃and   for   some   good
  purpose; though we may not always see it。               He made some people white;
  and    strong;   and   masterful;    andheartless。      He    made    others   black   and
  homely; and poor and weak〃
  〃And a lot of others ‘poor white' and shiftless;〃 smiled Warwick。
  〃He made us; too;〃 continued Rena; intent upon her own thought; 〃and
  He   must   have   had   a   reason   for   it。 Perhaps   He   meant   us   to   bring   the
  others together in his own good time。             A man may make a new place for
  himselfa woman is born and bound to hers。                 God must have meant me
  to stay here; or He would not have sent me back。                I shall accept things as
  they are。     Why should I seek the society of people whose friendshipand
  love   one   little   word   can   turn   to   scorn? I   was   right;   John;   I   ought   to
  have told him。       Suppose he had married me and then had found it out?〃
  To    Rena's   argument     of   divine   foreordination     Warwick      attached    no
  weight   whatever。       He   had   seen   God's   heel   planted   for   four   long   years
  upon the land which had nourished slavery。               Had God ordained the crime
  that    the  punishment       might    follow?     It   would     have   been    easier   for
  Omnipotence        to  prevent    the   crime。    The    experience     of  his  sister  had
  stirred up a certain bitterness against white peoplea feeling which he had
  put aside years ago; with his dark blood; but which sprang anew into life
  when   the   fact   of   his   own   origin   was   brought   home   to   him   so   forcibly
  through his sister's misfortune。          His sworn friend and promised brother…
  in… law had thrown him over promptly; upon the discovery of the hidden
  drop of dark blood。         How many others of his friends would do the same;
  if   they   but   knew   of   it? He   had   begun   to   feel   a   little   of   the   spiritual
  estrangement from his associates that he had noticed in Rena during her
  life   at  Clarence。     The     fact  that  several    persons    knew    his   secret  had
  spoiled   the   fine   flavor   of   perfect   security   hitherto   marking   his   position。
  George Tryon was a man of honor among white men; and had deigned to
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  extend the protection of his honor to Warwick as a man; though no longer
  as a friend; to Rena as a woman; but not as a wife。                  Tryon; however; was
  only human; and who could tell when their paths in life might cross again;
  or   what   future   temptation Tryon   might   feel   to   use   a   damaging   secret   to
  their disadvantage?         Warwick had cherished certain ambitions; but these
  he   must   now   put   behind   him。      In   the   obscurity   of   private   life;   his   past
  would      be   o