第 18 节
作者:津夏      更新:2021-04-30 15:57      字数:9322
  the wall; listening to the occasional rumbles of talk without being able to
  catch a word of it。      And then of a sudden there rose out of the silence the
  strangest little piping cry; and Mrs。 Peyton screamed out in her delight and
  the man ran into the parlour and flung himself down upon the horse…hair
  sofa; drumming his heels on it in his ecstasy。            But often the great cat Fate
  lets us go only to clutch us again in a fiercer grip。          As minute after minute
  passed and still no sound came from above save those thin; glutinous cries;
  Johnson   cooled   from   his   frenzy   of   joy;   and   lay   breathless   with   his   ears
  straining。     They     were    moving     slowly    about。    They     were   talking    in
  subdued tones。       Still minute after minute passing; and no word from the
  voice   for   which   he   listened。    His   nerves   were   dulled   by   his   night   of
  trouble; and he waited in limp wretchedness upon his sofa。                 There he still
  sat   when   the  doctors   came   down to hima  bedraggled;  miserable   figure
  with his face grimy and his hair unkempt from his long vigil。                 He rose as
  they entered; bracing himself against the mantelpiece。
  〃Is she dead?〃 he asked。
  〃Doing well;〃 answered the doctor。
  And at the words that little conventional spirit which had never known
  until that night the capacity for fierce agony which lay within it; learned
  for the second time that there were springs of joy also which it had never
  tapped before。       His impulse was to fall upon his knees; but he was shy
  before the doctors。
  〃Can I go up?〃
  〃In a few minutes。〃
  〃I'm sure; doctor; I'm veryI'm very〃 he grew inarticulate。               〃Here
  are your three guineas; Dr。 Pritchard。          I wish they were three hundred。〃
  〃So do I;〃 said the senior man; and they laughed as they shook hands。
  Johnson   opened   the   shop   door   for   them  and   heard   their   talk   as   they
  stood for an instant outside。
  〃Looked nasty at one time。〃          〃Very glad to have your help。〃
  〃Delighted;     I'm   sure。   Won't     you   step   round    and   have   a  cup   of
  coffee?〃
  〃No; thanks。      I'm expecting another case。〃
  The firm step and the dragging one passed away to the right and the
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  left。   Johnson   turned   from   the   door   still   with   that   turmoil   of   joy   in   his
  heart。    He seemed to be making a new start in life。             He felt that he was a
  stronger and a deeper man。           Perhaps all this suffering had an object then。
  It   might   prove to   be   a   blessing   both   to his   wife   and   to   him。 The   very
  thought     was   one   which    he   would    have   been    incapable    of  conceiving
  twelve hours before。        He was full of new emotions。            If there had been a
  harrowing there had been a planting too。
  〃Can I come up?〃 he cried; and then; without waiting for an answer; he
  took the steps three at a time。
  Mrs。 Peyton was standing by a soapy bath with a bundle in her hands。
  From   under   the   curve   of   a   brown   shawl   there   looked   out   at   him   the
  strangest   little   red   face   with   crumpled   features;   moist;   loose   lips;   and
  eyelids which quivered like a rabbit's nostrils。            The weak neck had let the
  head topple over; and it rested upon the shoulder。
  〃Kiss it; Robert!〃 cried the grandmother。 〃Kiss             your son!〃
  But he felt a resentment to the little; red; blinking creature。             He could
  not forgive it yet for that long night of misery。          He caught sight of a white
  face in the bed and he ran towards it with such love and pity as his speech
  could find no words for。
  〃Thank God it is over!        Lucy; dear; it was dreadful!〃
  〃But I'm so happy now。          I never was so happy in my life。〃
  Her eyes were fixed upon the brown bundle。
  〃You mustn't talk;〃 said Mrs。 Peyton。
  〃But don't leave me;〃        whispered his wife。
  So he sat in silence with his hand in hers。           The lamp was burning dim
  and the first cold light of dawn was breaking through the window。                      The
  night had been long and dark but the day was the sweeter and the purer in
  consequence。        London was waking up。            The roar began to rise from the
  street。    Lives   had   come   and   lives   had   gone;   but   the   great   machine   was
  still working out its dim and tragic destiny。
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  SWEETHEARTS。
  It is hard for the general practitioner who sits among his patients both
  morning and evening; and sees them in their homes between; to steal time
  for one little daily breath of cleanly air。        To win it he must slip early from
  his   bed   and   walk   out   between   shuttered   shops   when   it   is   chill   but   very
  clear; and all things are sharply outlined; as in a frost。            It is an hour that
  has a charm of its own; when; but for a postman or a milkman; one has the
  pavement   to   oneself;   and   even   the   most   common   thing   takes   an   ever…
  recurring freshness; as though causeway; and lamp; and signboard had all
  wakened to the new day。           Then even an inland city may seem beautiful;
  and bear virtue in its smoke…tainted air。
  But it was by the sea that I lived; in a town that was unlovely enough
  were it not for its glorious neighbour。          And who cares for the town when
  one can sit on the bench at the headland; and look out over the huge; blue
  bay;   and   the   yellow   scimitar   that   curves   before   it。 I   loved   it   when   its
  great face was freckled with the fishing boats; and I loved it when the big
  ships went past; far out; a little hillock of white and no hull; with topsails
  curved like   a bodice; so stately  and demure。            But   most of all   I loved   it
  when no trace of man   marred the majesty of Nature; and when the sun…
  bursts slanted down on it from between the drifting rainclouds。                   Then I
  have seen the further edge draped in the gauze of the driving rain; with its
  thin grey shading under the slow clouds; while my headland was golden;
  and the sun gleamed upon the breakers and struck deep through the green
  waves beyond; showing up the purple patches where the beds of seaweed
  are lying。     Such a morning as that; with the wind in his hair; and the spray
  on his lips; and the cry of the eddying gulls in his ear; may send a man
  back    braced    afresh    to  the  reek   of   a  sick…room;    and    the  dead;   drab
  weariness of practice。
  It was on such another day that I first saw my old man。                 He came to
  my   bench   just   as   I   was   leaving   it。 My   eye   must   have   picked   him   out
  even    in  a   crowded    street;   for  he  was   a  man   of  large   frame   and   fine
  presence; with something of distinction in the set of his lip and the poise
  of   his   head。  He   limped   up   the   winding   path   leaning   heavily   upon   his
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  stick; as though those great shoulders had become too much at last for the
  failing limbs that bore them。          As he approached; my eyes caught Nature's
  danger   signal;   that   faint   bluish   tinge   in   nose   and   lip   which   tells   of   a
  labouring heart。
  〃The brae is a little trying; sir;〃 said I。          〃Speaking       as a physician; I
  should say that you would do well to rest here before you go further。〃
  He inclined his head in a stately; old…world fashion; and seated himself
  upon the bench。         Seeing that he had no wish to speak I was silent also;
  but I could not help watching him out of the corners of my eyes; for he
  was   such   a   wonderful   survival   of   the   early  half   of   the   century;   with   his
  low…crowned; curly…brimmed hat; his black satin tie which fastened with a
  buckle at the back; and; above all; his large; fleshy; clean…shaven face shot
  with   its   mesh   of   wrinkles。    Those   eyes;   ere   they   had   grown   dim;   had
  looked out from the box…seat of mail coaches; and had seen the knots of
  navvies as they toiled on the brown embankments。                  Those lips had smiled
  over the first numbers of 〃Pickwick;〃 and had gossiped of the promising
  young      man    who     wrote    them。     The     face   itself  was    a   seventy…year
  almanack; and every seam an entry upon i