第 3 节
作者:不言败      更新:2021-02-21 15:46      字数:9322
  get it back from a friend。。。〃 he broke off in confusion。
  〃Well; we will talk about it then; sir。〃
  〃Good…bye… are you always at home alone; your sister is not here
  with you?〃 He asked her as casually as possible as he went out into
  the passage。
  〃What business is she of yours; my good sir?〃
  〃Oh; nothing particular; I simply asked。 You are too quick。。。。
  Good…day; Alyona Ivanovna。〃
  Raskolnikov went out in complete confusion。 This confusion became
  more and more intense。 As he went down the stairs; he even stopped
  short; two or three times; as though suddenly struck by some
  thought。 When he was in the street he cried out; 〃Oh; God; how
  loathsome it all is! and can I; can I possibly。。。。 No; it's
  nonsense; it's rubbish!〃 he added resolutely。 〃And how could such an
  atrocious thing come into my head? What filthy things my heart is
  capable of。 Yes; filthy above all; disgusting; loathsome;
  loathsome!… and for a whole month I've been。。。。〃 But no words; no
  exclamations; could express his agitation。 The feeling of intense
  repulsion; which had begun to oppress and torture his heart while he
  was on his way to the old woman; had by now reached such a pitch and
  had taken such a definite form that he did not know what to do with
  himself to escape from his wretchedness。 He walked along the
  pavement like a drunken man; regardless of the passers…by; and
  jostling against them; and only came to his senses when he was in
  the next street。 Looking round; he noticed that he was standing
  close to a tavern which was entered by steps leading from the pavement
  to the basement。 At that instant two drunken men came out at the door;
  and abusing and supporting one another; they mounted the steps。
  Without stopping to think; Raskolnikov went down the steps at once。
  Till that moment he had never been into a tavern; but now he felt
  giddy and was tormented by a burning thirst。 He longed for a drink
  of cold beer; and attributed his sudden weakness to the want of
  food。 He sat down at a sticky little table in a dark and dirty corner;
  ordered some beer; and eagerly drank off the first glassful。 At once
  he felt easier; and his thoughts became clear。
  〃All that's nonsense;〃 he said hopefully; 〃and there is nothing in
  it all to worry about! It's simply physical derangement。 Just a
  glass of beer; a piece of dry bread… and in one moment the brain is
  stronger; the mind is clearer and the will is firm! Phew; how
  utterly petty it all is!〃
  But in spite of this scornful reflection; he was by now looking
  cheerful as though he were suddenly set free from a terrible burden:
  and he gazed round in a friendly way at the people in the room。 But
  even at that moment he had a dim foreboding that this happier frame of
  mind was also not normal。
  There were few people at the time in the tavern。 Besides the two
  drunken men he had met on the steps; a group consisting of about
  five men and a girl with a concertina had gone out at the same time。
  Their departure left the room quiet and rather empty。 The persons
  still in the tavern were a man who appeared to be an artisan; drunk;
  but not extremely so; sitting before a pot of beer; and his companion;
  a huge; stout man with a grey beard; in a short full…skirted coat。
  He was very drunk: and had dropped asleep on the bench; every now
  and then; he began as though in his sleep; cracking his fingers;
  with his arms wide apart and the upper part of his body bounding about
  on the bench; while he hummed some meaningless refrain; trying to
  recall some such lines as these:
  …
  〃His wife a year he fondly loved
  His wife a… a year he… fondly loved。〃
  …
  Or suddenly waking up again:
  …
  〃Walking along the crowded row
  He met the one he used to know。〃
  …
  But no one shared his enjoyment: his silent companion looked with
  positive hostility and mistrust at all these manifestations。 There was
  another man in the room who looked somewhat like a retired
  government clerk。 He was sitting apart; now and then sipping from
  his pot and looking round at the company。 He; too; appeared to be in
  some agitation。
  Chapter Two
  RASKOLNIKOV was not used to crowds; and; as we said before; he
  avoided society of every sort; more especially of late。 But now all at
  once he felt a desire to be with other people。 Something new seemed to
  be taking place within him; and with it he felt a sort of thirst for
  company。 He was so weary after a whole month of concentrated
  wretchedness and gloomy excitement that he longed to rest; if only for
  a moment; in some other world; whatever it might be; and; in spite
  of the filthiness of the surroundings; he was glad now to stay in
  the tavern。
  The master of the establishment was in another room; but he
  frequently came down some steps into the main room; his jaunty; tarred
  boots with red turn…over tops coming into view each time before the
  rest of his person。 He wore a full coat and a horribly greasy black
  satin waistcoat; with no cravat; and his whole face seemed smeared
  with oil like an iron lock。 At the counter stood a boy of about
  fourteen; and there was another boy somewhat younger who handed
  whatever was wanted。 On the counter lay some sliced cucumber; some
  pieces of dried black bread; and some fish; chopped up small; all
  smelling very bad。 It was insufferably close; and so heavy with the
  fumes of spirits that five minutes in such an atmosphere might well
  make a man drunk。
  There are chance meetings with strangers that interest us from the
  first moment; before a word is spoken。 Such was the impression made on
  Raskolnikov by the person sitting a little distance from him; who
  looked like a retired clerk。 The young man often recalled this
  impression afterwards; and even ascribed it to presentiment。 He looked
  repeatedly at the clerk; partly no doubt because the latter was
  staring persistently at him; obviously anxious to enter into
  conversation。 At the other persons in the room; including the
  tavern…keeper; the clerk looked as though he were used to their
  company; and weary of it; showing a shade of condescending contempt
  for them as persons of station and culture inferior to his own; with
  whom it would be useless for him to converse。 He was a man over fifty;
  bald and grizzled; of medium height; and stoutly built。 His face;
  bloated from continual drinking; was of a yellow; even greenish;
  tinge; with swollen eyelids out of which keen reddish eyes gleamed
  like little chinks。 But there was something very strange in him; there
  was a light in his eyes as though of intense feeling… perhaps there
  were even thought and intelligence; but at the same time there was a
  gleam of something like madness。 He was wearing an old and
  hopelessly ragged black dress coat; with all its buttons missing
  except one; and that one he had buttoned; evidently clinging to this
  last trace of respectability。 A crumpled shirt front covered with
  spots and stains; protruded from his canvas waistcoat。 Like a clerk;
  he wore no beard; nor moustache