第 17 节
作者:做男人挺好的      更新:2021-02-20 15:18      字数:9322
  Thus equipped; he ceased from wood…chopping; and began to make more
  than a mere living。  Nor was he downhearted when the scurvy broke
  out on his own body。  Ever he ran his trap…lines and sang his
  ancient chant。  Nor could the pessimist shake his surety of the
  three hundred thousand of Alaskan gold he as going to shake out of
  the moss…roots。
  〃But this ain't gold…country;〃 they told him。
  〃Gold is where you find it; son; as I should know who was mining
  before you was born; 'way back in Forty…Nine;〃 was his reply。
  〃What was Bonanza Creek but a moose…pasture?  No miner'd look at
  it; yet they washed five…hundred…dollar pans and took out fifty
  million dollars。  Eldorado was just as bad。  For all you know;
  right under this here cabin; or right over the next hill; is
  millions just waiting for a lucky one like me to come and shake it
  out。〃
  At the end of January came his disaster。  Some powerful animal that
  he decided was a bob…cat; managing to get caught in one of his
  smaller traps; dragged it away。  A heavy snow…fall put a stop
  midway to his pursuit; losing the trail for him and losing himself。
  There were but several hours of daylight each day between the
  twenty hours of intervening darkness; and his efforts in the grey
  light and continually falling snow succeeded only in losing him
  more thoroughly。  Fortunately; when winter snow falls in the
  Northland the thermometer invariably rises; so; instead of the
  customary forty and fifty and even sixty degrees below zero; the
  temperature remained fifteen below。  Also; he was warmly clad and
  had a full matchbox。  Further to mitigate his predicament; on the
  fifth day he killed a wounded moose that weighed over half a ton。
  Making his camp beside it on a spruce…bottom; he was prepared to
  last out the winter; unless a searching party found him or his
  scurvy grew worse。
  But at the end of two weeks there had been no sign of search; while
  his scurvy had undeniably grown worse。  Against his fire; banked
  from outer cold by a shelter…wall of spruce…boughs; he crouched
  long hours in sleep and long hours in waking。  But the waking hours
  grew less; becoming semi…waking or half…dreaming hours as the
  process of hibernation worked their way with him。  Slowly the
  sparkle point of consciousness and identity that was John Tarwater
  sank; deeper and deeper; into the profounds of his being that had
  been compounded ere man was man; and while he was becoming man;
  when he; first of all animals; regarded himself with an
  introspective eye and laid the beginnings of morality in
  foundations of nightmare peopled by the monsters of his own ethic…
  thwarted desires。
  Like a man in fever; waking to intervals of consciousness; so Old
  Tarwater awoke; cooked his moose…meat; and fed the fire; but more
  and more time he spent in his torpor; unaware of what was day…dream
  and what was sleep…dream in the content of his unconsciousness。
  And here; in the unforgetable crypts of man's unwritten history;
  unthinkable and unrealizable; like passages of nightmare or
  impossible adventures of lunacy; he encountered the monsters
  created of man's first morality that ever since have vexed him into
  the spinning of fantasies to elude them or do battle with them。
  In short; weighted by his seventy years; in the vast and silent
  loneliness of the North; Old Tarwater; as in the delirium of drug
  or anaesthetic; recovered within himself; the infantile mind of the
  child…man of the early world。  It was in the dusk of Death's
  fluttery wings that Tarwater thus crouched; and; like his remote
  forebear; the child…man; went to myth…making; and sun…heroizing;
  himself hero…maker and the hero in quest of the immemorable
  treasure difficult of attainment。
  Either must he attain the treasure … for so ran the inexorable
  logic of the shadow…land of the unconscious … or else sink into the
  all…devouring sea; the blackness eater of the light that swallowed
  to extinction the sun each night 。 。 。 the sun that arose ever in
  rebirth next morning in the east; and that had become to man man's
  first symbol of immortality through rebirth。  All this; in the
  deeps of his unconsciousness (the shadowy western land of
  descending light); was the near dusk of Death down into which he
  slowly ebbed。
  But how to escape this monster of the dark that from within him
  slowly swallowed him?  Too deep…sunk was he to dream of escape or
  feel the prod of desire to escape。  For him reality had ceased。
  Nor from within the darkened chamber of himself could reality
  recrudesce。  His years were too heavy upon him; the debility of
  disease and the lethargy and torpor of the silence and the cold
  were too profound。  Only from without could reality impact upon him
  and reawake within him an awareness of reality。  Otherwise he would
  ooze down through the shadow…realm of the unconscious into the all…
  darkness of extinction。
  But it came; the smash of reality from without; crashing upon his
  ear drums in a loud; explosive snort。  For twenty days; in a
  temperature that had never risen above fifty below; no breath of
  wind had blown movement; no slightest sound had broken the silence。
  Like the smoker on the opium couch refocusing his eyes from the
  spacious walls of dream to the narrow confines of the mean little
  room; so Old Tarwater stared vague…eyed before him across his dying
  fire; at a huge moose that stared at him in startlement; dragging a
  wounded leg; manifesting all signs of extreme exhaustion; it; too;
  had been straying blindly in the shadow…land; and had wakened to
  reality only just ere it stepped into Tarwater's fire。
  He feebly slipped the large fur mitten lined with thickness of wool
  from his right hand。  Upon trial he found the trigger finger too
  numb for movement。  Carefully; slowly; through long minutes; he
  worked the bare hand inside his blankets; up under his fur PARKA;
  through the chest openings of his shirts; and into the slightly
  warm hollow of his left arm…pit。  Long minutes passed ere the
  finger could move; when; with equal slowness of caution; he
  gathered his rifle to his shoulder and drew bead upon the great
  animal across the fire。
  At the shot; of the two shadow…wanderers; the one reeled downward
  to the dark and the other reeled upward to the light; swaying
  drunkenly on his scurvy…ravaged legs; shivering with nervousness
  and cold; rubbing swimming eyes with shaking fingers; and staring
  at the real world all about him that had returned to him with such
  sickening suddenness。  He shook himself together; and realized that
  for long; how long he did not know; he had bedded in the arms of
  Death。  He spat; with definite intention; heard the spittle crackle
  in the frost; and judged it must be below and far below sixty
  below。  In truth; that day at Fort Yukon; the spirit thermometer
  registered seventy…five degrees below zero; which; since freezing…
  point is thirty…two above; was equivalent to one hundred and seven
  degrees of frost。
  Slowly Tarwater's brain reasoned to action。  Here; in the vast
  alone; dwelt Death。  Here had come two wounded moose。  With the
  clearing of the sky after the great cold came on; he had located
  his bearings; and he knew that both wounded moose had trailed to
  him from the east。  Therefore; in the east; were men … whites or
  Indians he could not tell; but at any rate men who might stand by
  him in his need and help moor him to reality above the sea of dark。
  He moved slowly; but he moved in reality; girding himself with
  rifle; ammunition; matches; and a pack of twenty pounds of moose…
  meat。  Then; an Argus rejuvenated; albeit lame of both legs and
  tottery; he turned his back on the perilous west and limped into
  the sun…arising; re…birthing east。 。 。 。
  Days later … how many days later he was never to know … dreaming
  dreams and seeing visions; cackling his old gold…chant of Forty…
  Nine; like one drowning and swimming feebly to keep his
  consciousness above the engulfing dark; he came out upon the snow…
  slope to a canyon and saw below smoke rising and men who ceased
  from work to gaze at him。  He tottered down the hill to them; still
  singing; and when he ceased from lack of breath they called him
  variously:  Santa Claus; Old Christmas; Whiskers; the Last of the
  Mohicans; and Father Christmas。  And when he stood among them he
  stood very still; without speech; while great tears welled out of
  his eyes。  He cried silently; a long time; till; as if suddenly
  bethinking himself; he sat down in the snow with much creaking and
  crackling of his joints; and from this low vantage point toppled
  sidewise and fainted calmly and easily away。
  In less than a week Old Tarwater was up and limping about the
  housework of the cabin; cooking and dish…washing for the five men
  of the creek。  Genuine sourdoughs (pioneers) they were; tough and
  hard…bitten; who had been buried so deeply inside the Circle that
  they did not know there was a Klondike Str