第 23 节
作者:想聊      更新:2021-02-19 01:11      字数:9322
  crisp details; its delicate contrasts; its arabesques of color; and
  allow the sovereign lady to see a tear upon some petal more expanded
  than the rest。 What do we give to God? perfumes; light; and song; the
  purest expression of our nature。 Well; these offerings to God; are
  they not likewise offered to love in this poem of luminous flowers
  murmuring their sadness to the heart; cherishing its hidden
  transports; its unuttered hopes; its illusions which gleam and fall to
  fragments like the gossamer of a summer's night?
  Such neutral pleasures help to soothe a nature irritated by long
  contemplation of the person beloved。 They were to me; I dare not say
  to her; like those fissures in a dam through which the water finds a
  vent and avoids disaster。 Abstinence brings deadly exhaustion; which a
  few crumbs falling from heaven like manna in the desert; suffices to
  relieve。 Sometimes I found my Henriette standing before these bouquets
  with pendant arms; lost in agitated reverie; thoughts swelling her
  bosom; illumining her brow as they surged in waves and sank again;
  leaving lassitude and languor behind them。 Never again have I made a
  bouquet for any one。 When she and I had created this language and
  formed it to our uses; a satisfaction filled our souls like that of a
  slave who escapes his masters。
  During the rest of this month as I came from the meadows through the
  gardens I often saw her face at the window; and when I reached the
  salon she was ready at her embroidery frame。 If I did not arrive at
  the hour expected (though never appointed); I saw a white form
  wandering on the terrace; and when I joined her she would say; 〃I came
  to meet you; I must show a few attentions to my youngest child。〃
  The miserable games of backgammon had come to end。 The count's late
  purchases took all his time in going hither and thither about the
  property; surveying; examining; and marking the boundaries of his new
  possessions。 He had orders to give; rural works to overlook which
  needed a master's eye;all of them planned and decided on by his wife
  and himself。 We often went to meet him; the countess and I; with the
  children; who amused themselves on the way by running after insects;
  stag…beetles; darning…needles; they too making their bouquets; or to
  speak more truly; their bundles of flowers。 To walk beside the woman
  we love; to take her on our arm; to guide her steps;these are
  illimitable joys that suffice a lifetime。 Confidence is then complete。
  We went alone; we returned with the 〃general;〃 a title given to the
  count when he was good…humored。 These two ways of taking the same path
  gave light and shade to our pleasure; a secret known only to hearts
  debarred from union。 Our talk; so free as we went; had hidden
  significations as we returned; when either of us gave an answer to
  some furtive interrogation; or continued a subject; already begun; in
  the enigmatic phrases to which our language lends itself; and which
  women are so ingenious in composing。 Who has not known the pleasure of
  such secret understandings in a sphere apart from those about us; a
  sphere where spirits meet outside of social laws?
  One day a wild hope; quickly dispelled; took possession of me; when
  the count; wishing to know what we were talking of; put the inquiry;
  and Henriette answered in words that allowed another meaning; which
  satisfied him。 This amused Madeleine; who laughed; after a moment her
  mother blushed and gave me a forbidding look; as if to say she might
  still withdraw from me her soul as she had once withdrawn her hand。
  But our purely spiritual union had far too many charms; and on the
  morrow it continued as before。
  The hours; days; and weeks fled by; filled with renascent joys。 Grape
  harvest; the festal season in Touraine; began。 Toward the end of
  September the sun; less hot than during the wheat harvest; allows of
  our staying in the vineyards without danger of becoming overheated。 It
  is easier to gather grapes than to mow wheat。 Fruits of all kinds are
  ripe; harvests are garnered; bread is less dear; the sense of plenty
  makes the country people happy。 Fears as to the results of rural toil;
  in which more money than sweat is often spent; vanish before a full
  granary and cellars about to overflow。 The vintage is then like a gay
  dessert after the dinner is eaten; the skies of Touraine; where the
  autumns are always magnificent; smile upon it。 In this hospitable land
  the vintagers are fed and lodged in the master's house。 The meals are
  the only ones throughout the year when these poor people taste
  substantial; well…cooked food; and they cling to the custom as the
  children of patriarchal families cling to anniversaries。 As the time
  approaches they flock in crowds to those houses where the masters are
  known to treat the laborers liberally。 The house is full of people and
  of provisions。 The presses are open。 The country is alive with the
  coming and going of itinerant coopers; of carts filled with laughing
  girls and joyous husbandmen; who earn better wages than at any other
  time during the year; and who sing as they go。 There is also another
  cause of pleasurable content: classes and ranks are equal; women;
  children; masters; and men; all that little world; share in the
  garnering of the divine hoard。 These various elements of satisfaction
  explain the hilarity of the vintage; transmitted from age to age in
  these last glorious days of autumn; the remembrance of which inspired
  Rabelais with the bacchic form of his great work。
  The children; Jacques and Madeleine; had never seen a vintage; I was
  like them; and they were full of infantine delight at finding a sharer
  of their pleasure; their mother; too; promised to accompany us。 We
  went to Villaines; where baskets are manufactured; in quest of the
  prettiest that could be bought; for we four were to cut certain rows
  reserved for our scissors; it was; however; agreed that none of us
  were to eat too many grapes。 To eat the fat bunches of Touraine in a
  vineyard seemed so delicious that we all refused the finest grapes on
  the dinner…table。 Jacques made me swear I would go to no other
  vineyard; but stay closely at Clochegourde。 Never were these frail
  little beings; usually pallid and smiling; so fresh and rosy and
  active as they were this morning。 They chattered for chatter's sake;
  and trotted about without apparent object; they suddenly seemed; like
  other children; to have more life than they needed; neither Monsieur
  nor Madame de Mortsauf had ever seen them so before。 I became a child
  again with them; more of a child than either of them; perhaps; I; too;
  was hoping for my harvest。 It was glorious weather when we went to the
  vineyard; and we stayed there half the day。 How we disputed as to who
  had the finest grapes and who could fill his basket quickest! The
  little human shoots ran to and fro from the vines to their mother; not
  a bunch could be cut without showing it to her。 She laughed with the
  good; gay laugh of her girlhood when I; running up with my basket
  after Madeleine; cried out; 〃Mine too! See mine; mamma!〃 To which she
  answered: 〃Don't get overheated; dear child。〃 Then passing her hand
  round my neck and through my hair; she added; giving me a little tap
  on the cheek; 〃You are melting away。〃 It was the only caress she ever
  gave me。 I looked at the pretty line of purple clusters; the hedges
  full of haws and blackberries; I heard the voices of the children; I
  watched the trooping girls; the cart loaded with barrels; the men with
  the panniers。 Ah; it is all engraved on my memory; even to the almond…
  tree beside which she stood; girlish; rosy; smiling; beneath the
  sunshade held open in her hand。 Then I busied myself in cutting the
  bunches and filling my basket; going forward to empty it in the vat;
  silently; with measured bodily movement and slow steps that left my
  spirit free。 I discovered then the ineffable pleasure of an external
  labor which carries life along; and thus regulates the rush of
  passion; often so near; but for this mechanical motion; to kindle into
  flame。 I learned how much wisdom is contained in uniform labor; I
  understood monastic discipline。
  For the first time in many days the count was neither surly nor cruel。
  His son was so well; the future Duc de Lenoncourt…Mortsauf; fair and
  rosy and stained with grape…juice; rejoiced his heart。 This day being
  the last of the vintage; he had promised a dance in front of
  Clochegourde in honor of the return of the Bourbons; so that our
  festival gratified everybody。 As we returned to the house; the
  countess took my arm and leaned upon it; as if to let my heart feel
  the weight of hers;the instinctive movement of a mother who seeks to
  convey her joy。 Then she whispered in my ear; 〃You bring us
  happiness。〃
  Ah; to me; who knew her sleepless nights; her cares; her fears; her
  former existence; in which; although the hand of God sustained her;
  all was barren and wearisome; those words u