第 136 节
作者:温暖寒冬      更新:2024-04-09 19:50      字数:9211
  night;   and   the   dark   wall   opposite   the   window   shuts   out
  the moonlight that might have struggled with the light of the one
  dip candle by which Bartle Massey is pretending to read; while he
  is really looking over his spectacles at Adam Bede; seated near the
  dark window。
  You would hardly have known it was Adam without being told。
  His face has got thinner this last week: he has the sunken eyes; the
  neglected   beard   of   a   man   just   risen   from   a   sick…bed。   His   heavy
  black hair hangs over his forehead; and there is no active impulse
  in   him   which   inclines   him   to   push   it   off;   that   he   may   be   more
  awake to what is around him。 He has one arm over the back of the
  chair; and he seems to be looking down at his clasped hands。 He is
  roused by a knock at the door。
  “There      he   is;”   said   Bartle     Massey;     rising    hastily   and
  unfastening the door。 It was Mr。 Irwine。
  Adam rose from his chair with instinctive respect; as Mr。 Irwine
  approached him and took his hand。
  “I’m   late;  Adam;”     he  said;  sitting   down    on  the   chair  which
  Bartle placed for him; “but I was later in setting off from Broxton
  than I intended to be; and I have been incessantly occupied since I
  arrived。   I   have   done   everything   now;   however—everything   that
  can be done to…night; at least。 Let us all sit down。”
  George Eliot                                                      ElecBook Classics
  … Page 554…
  Adam Bede                                      554
  Adam took his chair again mechanically; and Bartle; for whom
  there was no chair remaining; sat on the bed in the background。
  “Have you seen her; sir?” said Adam tremulously。
  “Yes;   Adam;   I   and   the   chaplain   have   both   been   with   her   this
  evening。”
  “Did you ask her; sir 。 。 。 did you say anything about me?”
  “Yes;” said Mr。 Irwine; with some hesitation; “I spoke of you。 I
  said you wished to see her before the trial; if she consented。”
  As    Mr。   Irwine     paused;     Adam      looked    at   him    with    eager;
  questioning eyes。
  “You   know   she   shrinks   from   seeing   any   one;   Adam。   It   is   not
  only   you—some   fatal   influence   seems   to   have   shut   up   her   heart
  against her fellow…creatures。 She has scarcely said anything more
  than   ‘No’   either   to   me   or   the   chaplain。   Three   or   four   days   ago;
  before you were mentioned to her; when I asked her if there was
  any one of her family whom she would like to  see—to  whom   she
  could open her mind—she said; with a violent shudder; ‘Tell them
  not to come near me—I won’t see any of them。’”
  Adam’s   head   was   hanging   down   again;   and   he   did   not   speak。
  There was silence for a few minutes; and then Mr。 Irwine said; “I
  don’t  like   to  advise   you  against  your  own   feelings;   Adam;   if   they
  now urge you strongly to go and see her to…morrow morning; even
  without       her    consent。     It   is   just    possible;     notwithstanding
  appearances   to   the   contrary;   that   the   interview   might   affect   her
  favourably。   But   I   grieve   to   say   I   have   scarcely   any   hope   of   that。
  She didn’t seem agitated when I mentioned your  name;   she   only
  said   ‘No;’   in   the   same   cold;   obstinate   way   as   usual。   And   if   the
  meeting      had   no   good    effect  on   her;   it  would    be  pure;    useless
  suffering     to   you—severe       suffering;     I  fear。  She    is  very    much
  George Eliot                                                         ElecBook Classics
  … Page 555…
  Adam Bede                                       555
  changed 。 。 。 ”
  Adam started up from his chair and seized his hat; which lay on
  the table。 But he stood still then; and looked at Mr。 Irwine; as if he
  had   a   question   to   ask   which   it   was   yet   difficult   to   utter。   Bartle
  Massey rose quietly; turned the key in the door; and put it in his
  pocket。
  “Is he come back?” said Adam at last。
  “No;   he   is  not;”   said   Mr。   Irwine;   quietly。   “Lay  down   your   hat;
  Adam; unless you like to walk out with me for a little   fresh air。   I
  fear you have not been out again to…day。”
  “You needn’t deceive me; sir;” said Adam; looking hard at Mr。
  Irwine and speaking in a tone of angry suspicion。 “You needn’t be
  afraid of me。 I only want justice。 I want him to feel what she feels。
  It’s   his   work   。   。   。   she   was   a   child   as   it   ’ud   ha’   gone   t’   anybody’s
  heart  to  look   at  。   。   。 I   don’t   care   what   she’s   done   。   。   。   it   was   him
  brought  her  to  it。   And   he   shall   know  it  。   。   。   he shall   feel   it   。   。   。   if
  there’s a just God; he shall feel what it is t’ ha’ brought a child like
  her to sin and misery。”
  “I’m     not   deceiving     you;    Adam;”      said   Mr。    Irwine。     “Arthur
  Donnithorne is not come back—was not come back when I left。 I
  have left a letter for him: he will know all as soon as he arrives。”
  “But   you   don’t   mind   about   it;”   said   Adam   indignantly。   “You
  think it doesn’t matter as she lies there in shame and misery; and
  he knows nothing about it—he suffers nothing。”
  “Adam; he will know—he will suffer; long and bitterly。 He has a
  heart     and    a   conscience:      I  can’t   be    entirely    deceived     in   his
  character。       I  am    convinced—I        am     sure   he    didn’t    fall  under
  temptation   without   a   struggle。   He   may   be   weak;   but   he          is   not
  callous; not coldly selfish。 I am persuaded that this will be a shock
  George Eliot                                                           ElecBook Classics
  … Page 556…
  Adam Bede                                       556
  of   which   he   will   feel   the   effects   all   his   life。   Why   do   you   crave
  vengeance in this way? No amount of torture that you could inflict
  on him could benefit her。”
  “No—O        God;   no;”   Adam      groaned     out;   sinking    on   his  chair
  again;   “but   then;   that’s   the   deepest   curse   of   all   。   。   。   that’s   what
  makes the blackness of it 。 。 。 it can never be undone。 My poor Hetty
  。 。 。 she can never be my sweet Hetty again 。 。 。 the prettiest thing
  God had made—smiling up at me 。 。 。 I thought she loved me 。 。 。
  and was good 。 。 。 ”
  Adam’s       voice    had    been     gradually     sinking     into   a   hoarse
  undertone; as if he were only talking to himself; but now he  said
  abruptly;   looking   at   Mr。   Irwine;   “But   she   isn’t   as   guilty   as   they
  say? You don’t think she is; sir? She can’t ha’ done it。”
  “That perhaps can never be known with certainty; Adam;” Mr。
  Irwine   answered   gently。   “In   these   cases   we   sometimes   form   our
  judgment on what seems to us strong evidence; and yet; for want
  of knowing some small fact; our judgment is wrong。 But suppose
  the worst: you have no right to say that the guilt of her crime lies
  with him; and that he ought to bear the punishment。 It is not for us
  men   to   apportion   the   shares   of   moral   guilt   and   retribution。   We
  find it impossible to avoid mistakes even in determining who has
  committed a single criminal act; and the problem how far a man is
  to be held responsible for the unforeseen consequences of his own
  deed   is   one   that might  well make   us   tremble   to look   into  it。   The
  evil   consequences   that   may   lie   folded   in   a   single     act   of  selfish
  indulgence   is   a   thought   so   awful   that   it   ought   surely   to   awaken
  some feeling less presumptuous than a rash desire to punish。 You
  have a mind that can understand this fully; Adam;  when   you  are
  calm。 Don’t suppose I can’t enter into the anguish that drives you
  George Eliot                                                          ElecBook Classics
  … Page 557…
  Adam Bede                                       557
  into this state of revengeful hatred。 But think of this: if you were to
  obey  your  passion—for  it is   passion;   and   you   deceive   yourself   in
  calling it justice—it might be with you precisely as it has been with
  Arthur;   nay;   worse;   your   passion   might   lead   you   yourself   into   a
  horrible crime。”
  “No—not        worse;”     said   Adam;     bitterly;    “I  don’t    believe    it’s
  worse—I’d   sooner   do   it—I’d   sooner   do   a   wickedn