第 4 节
作者:漂亮格子      更新:2022-08-26 22:13      字数:9322
  And; if not too tired with her drudgery; or wor…
  ried beyond endurance by her father; she would
  laugh at him with a blush; and say: 〃That's all
  right; Captain Hagberd; I am not impatient。〃
  〃Well; my dear; you haven't long to wait now;〃
  he would answer with a sudden bashfulness; and
  looking uneasily; as though he had suspected that
  there was something wrong somewhere。
  Every Monday she paid him his rent over the
  railings。  He clutched the shillings greedily。  He
  grudged every penny he had to spend on his main…
  tenance; and when he left her to make his purchases
  his bearing changed as soon as he got into the
  street。  Away from the sanction of her pity; he felt
  himself exposed without defence。  He brushed the
  walls with his shoulder。  He mistrusted the queer…
  ness of the people; yet; by then; even the town
  children had left off calling after him; and the
  tradesmen served him without a word。  The slight…
  est allusion to his clothing had the power to puzzle
  and frighten especially; as if it were something
  utterly unwarranted and incomprehensible。
  In the autumn; the driving rain drummed on his
  sailcloth suit saturated almost to the stiffness of
  sheet…iron; with its surface flowing with water。
  When the weather was too bad; he retreated under
  the tiny porch; and; standing close against the
  door; looked at his spade left planted in the middle
  of the yard。  The ground was so much dug up all
  over; that as the season advanced it turned to a
  quagmire。  When it froze hard; he was disconso…
  late。  What would Harry say?  And as he could
  not have so much of Bessie's company at that time
  of the year; the roars of old Carvil; that came muf…
  fled through the closed windows; calling her in…
  doors; exasperated him greatly。
  〃Why don't that extravagant fellow get you a
  servant?〃 he asked impatiently one mild after…
  noon。  She had thrown something over her head to
  run out for a while。
  〃I don't know;〃 said the pale Bessie; wearily;
  staring away with her heavy…lidded; grey; and un…
  expectant glance。  There were always smudgy
  shadows under her eyes; and she did not seem able
  to see any change or any end to her life。
  〃You wait till you get married; my dear;〃 said
  her only friend; drawing closer to the fence。
  〃Harry will get you one。〃
  His hopeful craze seemed to mock her own want
  of hope with so bitter an aptness that in her ner…
  vous irritation she could have screamed at him out…
  right。  But she only said in self…mockery; and
  speaking to him as though he had been sane;
  〃Why; Captain Hagberd; your son may not even
  want to look at me。〃
  He flung his head back and laughed his throaty
  affected cackle of anger。
  〃What!  That boy?  Not want to look at the
  only sensible girl for miles around?  What do you
  think I am here for; my dearmy dearmy dear?
  。 。 。  What?  You wait。  You just wait。  You'll
  see to…morrow。  I'll soon〃
  〃Bessie!  Bessie!  Bessie!〃 howled old Carvil in…
  side。  〃Bessie!my pipe!〃  That fat blind man
  had given himself up to a very lust of laziness。  He
  would not lift his hand to reach for the things she
  took care to leave at his very elbow。  He would not
  move a limb; he would not rise from his chair; he
  would not put one foot before another; in that par…
  lour (where he knew his way as well as if he had his
  sight); without calling her to his side and hanging
  all his atrocious weight on her shoulder。  He would
  not eat one single mouthful of food without her
  close attendance。  He had made himself helpless
  beyond his affliction; to enslave her better。  She
  stood still for a moment; setting her teeth in the
  dusk; then turned and walked slowly indoors。
  Captain Hagberd went back to his spade。  The
  shouting in Carvil's cottage stopped; and after a
  while the window of the parlour downstairs was lit
  up。  A man coming from the end of the street with
  a firm leisurely step passed on; but seemed to have
  caught sight of Captain Hagberd; because he
  turned back a pace or two。  A cold white light lin…
  gered in the western sky。  The man leaned over the
  gate in an interested manner。
  〃You must be Captain Hagberd;〃 he said; with
  easy assurance。
  The old man spun round; pulling out his spade;
  startled by the strange voice。
  〃Yes; I am;〃 he answered nervously。
  The other; smiling straight at him; uttered very
  slowly: 〃You've been advertising for your son; I
  believe?〃
  〃My son Harry;〃 mumbled Captain Hagberd;
  off his guard for once。  〃He's coming home to…
  morrow。〃
  〃The devil he is!〃  The stranger marvelled
  greatly; and then went on; with only a slight
  change of tone: 〃You've grown a beard like
  Father Christmas himself。〃
  Captain Hagberd drew a little nearer; and
  leaned forward over his spade。  〃Go your way;〃
  he said; resentfully and timidly at the same time;
  because he was always afraid of being laughed at。
  Every mental state; even madness; has its equi…
  librium based upon self…esteem。  Its disturbance
  causes unhappiness; and Captain Hagberd lived
  amongst a scheme of settled notions which it pained
  him to feel disturbed by people's grins。  Yes; peo…
  ple's grins were awful。  They hinted at something
  wrong: but what?  He could not tell; and that
  stranger was obviously grinninghad come on
  purpose to grin。  It was bad enough on the streets;
  but he had never before been outraged like this。
  The stranger; unaware how near he was of hav…
  ing his head laid open with a spade; said seriously:
  〃I am not trespassing where I stand; am I?  I
  fancy there's something wrong about your news。
  Suppose you let me come in。〃
  〃YOU come in!〃 murmured old Hagberd; with
  inexpressible horror。
  〃I could give you some real information about
  your sonthe very latest tip; if you care to
  hear。〃
  〃No;〃 shouted Hagberd。  He began to pace
  wildly to and fro; he shouldered his spade; he ges…
  ticulated with his other arm。  〃Here's a fellow
  a grinning fellow; who says there's something
  wrong。  I've got more information than you're
  aware of。  I've all the information I want。  I've
  had it for yearsfor yearsfor yearsenough
  to last me till to…morrow。  Let you come in; indeed!
  What would Harry say?〃
  Bessie Carvil's figure appeared in black silhou…
  ette on the parlour window; then; with the sound of
  an opening door; flitted out before the other cot…
  tage; all black; but with something white over
  her head。  These two voices beginning to talk sud…
  denly outside (she had heard them indoors) had
  given her such an emotion that she could not utter
  a sound。
  Captain Hagberd seemed to be trying to find his
  way out of a cage。  His feet squelched in the pud…
  dles left by his industry。  He stumbled in the holes
  of the ruined grass…plot。  He ran blindly against
  the fence。
  〃Here; steady a bit!〃 said the man at the gate;
  gravely stretching his arm over and catching him
  by the sleeve。  〃Somebody's been trying to get at
  you。  Hallo! what's this rig you've got on?  Storm
  canvas; by George!〃  He had a big laugh。
  〃Well; you ARE a character!〃
  Captain Hagberd jerked himself free; and began
  to back away shrinkingly。  〃For the present;〃 he
  muttered; in a crestfallen tone。
  〃What's the matter with him?〃  The stranger
  addressed Bessie with the utmost familiarity; in a
  deliberate; explanatory tone。  〃I didn't want to
  startle the old man。〃  He lowered his voice as
  though he had known her for years。  〃I dropped
  into a barber's on my way; to get a twopenny
  shave; and they told me there he was something of
  a character。  The old man has been a character all
  his life。〃
  Captain Hagberd; daunted by the allusion to his
  clothing; had retreated inside; taking his spade
  with him; and the two at the gate; startled by the
  unexpected slamming of the door; heard the bolts
  being shot; the snapping of the lock; and the echo
  of an affected gurgling laugh within。
  〃I didn't want to upset him;〃 the man said;
  after a short silence。  〃What's the meaning of all
  this?  He isn't quite crazy。〃
  〃He has been worrying a long time about his
  lost son;〃