第 94 节
作者:这就是结局      更新:2022-08-21 16:40      字数:9322
  〃No;〃 said Ethel; 〃but I cannot help being sorry for Cocksmoor。  I
  thought patience would prepare the way; and the means be granted in
  good time; without hastinessonly earnestness。〃
  〃You had made a picture for yourself;〃 said Margaret gently。  〃Yes;
  we all make pictures for ourselves; and we are the foremost figures
  in them; but they are taken out of our hands; and we see others
  putting in rude touches; and spoiling our work; as it seems; but; by…
  and…by; we shall see that it is all guided。〃
  Ethel sighed。  〃Then having protested to my utmost against this
  concern; you think I ought to be amiable about it。〃
  〃And to let poor Mary enjoy it。  She would be so happy; if you would
  not bewilder her by your gloomy looks; and keep her to the hemming of
  your endless glazed calico bonnet strings。〃
  〃Poor old Mary!  I thought that was by her own desire。〃
  〃Only her dutiful allegiance to you; and; as making pincushions is
  nearly her greatest delight; it is cruel to make her think it; in
  some mysterious way; wrong and displeasing to you。〃
  Ethel laughed; and said; 〃I did not think Mary was in such awe of me。
  I'll set her free; then。  But; Margaret; do you really think I ought
  to give up my time to it?〃
  〃Could you not just let them have a few drawings; or a little bit of
  your company workjust enough for you not to annoy every one; and
  seem to be testifying against them?  You would not like to vex Meta。〃
  〃It will go hard; if I do not tell Meta my mind。  I cannot bear to
  see her deluded。〃
  〃I don't think she is;〃 said Margaret; 〃but she does not set her face
  against what others wish。  As papa says of his dear little humming…
  bird; she takes the honey; and leaves the poison。〃
  〃Yes; amid all that enjoyment; she is always choosing the good; and
  leaving the evil; always sacrificing something; and then being happy
  in the sacrifice!〃
  〃No one would guess it was a sacrifice; it is so joyously doneleast
  of all Meta herself。〃
  〃Her coming home from London was exactly a specimen of that
  sacrificeand no sacrifice;〃 said Ethel。
  〃What was that?〃 said Norman; who had come up to the window
  unobserved; and had been listening to their few last sentences。
  〃Did not you hear of it?  It was a sort of material turning away from
  vanity that made me respect the little rival Daisy; as much as I
  always admired her。
  〃Tell me;〃 said Norman。  〃When was it?〃
  〃Last spring。  You know Mr。 Rivers is always ill in London: indeed;
  papa says it would be the death of him; but Lady Leonora Langdale
  thinks it dreadful that Meta should not go to all the gaieties; and
  last year; when Mrs。 Larpent was gone; she insisted on her coming to
  stay with her for the season。  Now Meta thought it wrong to leave her
  father alone; and wanted not to have gone at all; but; to my
  surprise; Margaret advised her to yield; and go for some short fixed
  time。〃
  〃Yes;〃 said Margaret; 〃as all her elders thought it right; I did not
  think we could advise her to refuse absolutely。  Besides; it was a
  promise。〃
  〃She declared she would only stay three weeks; and the Langdales were
  satisfied; thinking that; once in London; they should keep her。  They
  little knew Meta; with her pretty ways of pretending that her
  resolution is only spoiled…child wilfulness。  None of you quite
  trusted her; did you; Margaret?  Even papa was almost afraid; though
  he wanted her very much to be at home; for poor Mr。 Rivers was so low
  and forlorn without her; though he would not let her know; because
  Lady Leonora had persuaded him to think it was all for her good。〃
  〃What did they do with her in London?〃 asked Norman。
  〃They did their utmost;〃 said Ethel。  〃They made engagements for her;
  and took her to parties and concertsthose she did enjoy very much
  and she had lessons in drawing and music; but whenever she wanted to
  see any exhibitions; or do anything; they always said there was time
  to spare。  I believe it was very charming; and she would have been
  very glad to stay; but she never would promise;and she was always
  thinking of her positive duty at home。  She seemed afterwards to
  think of her wishes to remain almost as if they had been a sin; but
  she saiddear little Metathat nothing had ever helped her so much
  as that she used to say to herself; whenever she was going out; 'I
  renounce the world。'  It came to a crisis at last; when Lady Leonora
  wanted her to be presentedthe Drawing…Room was after the end of her
  three weeksand she held out against it; though her aunt laughed at
  her; and treated her as if she was a silly; shy child。  At last; what
  do you think Meta did?  She went to her uncle; Lord Cosham; and
  appealed to him to say whether there was the least necessity for her
  to go to court。〃
  〃Then she gained the day?〃 said Norman。
  〃He was delighted with that spirited; yet coaxing way of hers; and
  admired her determination。  He told papa so himselffor you must
  know; when he heard all Meta had to say; he called her a very good
  girl; and said he would take her home himself on the Saturday she had
  fixed; and spend Sunday at Abbotstoke。  Oh! he was perfectly won by
  her sweet ways。  Was not it lucky? for before this Lady Leonora had
  written to Mr。 Rivers; and obtained from him a letter; which Meta had
  the next day; desiring her to stay for the Drawing…Room。  But Meta
  knew well enough how it was; and was not to be conquered that way; so
  she said she must go home to entertain her uncle; and that if her
  papa really wished it; she would return on Monday。〃
  〃Knowing well that Mr。 Rivers would be only too glad to keep her。〃
  〃Just so。  How happy they both did look; when they came in here on
  their way from the station where he had met her!  How she danced in;
  and how she sparkled with glee!〃 said Margaret; 〃and poor Mr。 Rivers
  was quite tremulous with the joy of having her back; hardly able to
  keep from fondling her every minute; and coming again into the room
  after they had taken leave; to tell me that his little girl had
  preferred her home; and her poor old father; to all the pleasures in
  London。  Oh; I was so glad they came!  That was a sight that did one
  good!  And then; I fancy Mr。 Rivers is a wee bit afraid of his
  brother…in…law; for he begged papa and Flora to come home and dine
  with them; but Flora was engaged to Mrs。 Hoxton。〃
  〃Ha!  Flora!〃 said Norman; as if he rather enjoyed her losing
  something through her going to Mrs。 Hoxton。  〃I suppose she would
  have given the world to go!〃
  〃I was so sorry;〃 said Ethel; 〃but I had to go instead; and it was
  delightful。  Papa made great friends with Lord Cosham; while Mr。
  Rivers went to sleep after dinner; and I had such a delightful
  wandering with Meta; listening to the nightingales; and hearing all
  about it。  I never knew Meta so well before。〃
  〃And there was no more question of her going back?〃 said Norman。
  〃No; indeed!  She said; when her uncle asked in joke; on Monday
  morning; whether she had packed up to return with him; Mr。 Rivers was
  quite nervously alarmed the first moment; lest she should intend it。〃
  〃That little Meta;〃 said Margaret。  〃Her wishes for substantial use
  have been pretty well realised!〃
  〃Um!〃 said Ethel。
  〃What do you mean?〃 said Norman sharply。  〃I should call her present
  position the perfection of feminine usefulness。〃
  〃So perhaps it is;〃 said Ethel; 〃but though she does it beautifully;
  and is very valuable; to be the mistress of a great luxurious house
  like that does not seem to me the subject of aspirations like
  Meta's。〃
  〃Think of the contrast with what she used to be;〃 said Margaret
  gently; 〃the pretty; gentle; playful toy that her father brought her
  up to be; living a life of mere accomplishments and self…indulgence;
  kind certainly; but never so as to endure any disagreeables; or make
  any exertion。  But as soon as she entered into the true spirit of our
  calling; did she not begin to seek to live the sterner life; and
  train herself in duty?  The quiet way she took always seemed to me
  the great beauty of it。  She makes duties of her accomplishments by
  making them loving obedience to her father。〃
  〃Not that they are not pleasant to her?〃 interposed Norman。
  〃Certainly;〃 said Margaret; 〃but it gives them the zest; and
  confidence that they are right; which one could not have in such
  things merely for one's own amusement。〃
  〃Yes;〃 said Ethel; 〃she does more; she told me one day that one
  reason she liked sketching was; that looking into nature always made
  psalms and hymns sing in her ears; and so with her music and her
  beautiful copies from the old Italian devotional pictures。  She says
  our papa taught her to look at them so as to see more than the mere
  art and beauty。〃
  〃Think how diligently she measures out her day;〃 said Margaret;
  〃getting up early; to be sure of time for reading her serious books;
  and working hard at her tough studies。〃
  〃And what I care for still more;〃 said Ethel; 〃her being bent on
  learning plain needlework and doing it for her poor people。  She is
  so useful amongst the cottagers at Abbotstoke!〃
  〃And a famous little mistress of the house;〃 added Margaret。  〃When
  the old housekeeper went away two years ago; she thought she ought to
  know something about the governmen