that　where　Mrs。　Stubbs　owed　a　hundred　pounds；　she　might　owe　a
  thousand）　so　I　sent　for　Mr。　Nabb；　and　tendering　him　a　cheque　for
  150L。　and　his　costs；　requested　to　be　let　out　forthwith。　　〃Here；
  fellow；〃　said　I；　〃is　a　cheque　on　Child's　for　your　paltry　sum。〃
  〃It　may　be　a　sheck　on　Shild's；〃　says　Mr。　Nabb；　〃but　I　should　be　a
  baby　to　let　you　out　on　such　a　paper　as　dat。〃
  〃Well；〃　said　I；　〃Child's　is　but　a　step　from　this：　you　may　go　and
  get　the　cash；just　give　me　an　acknowledgment。〃
  Nabb　drew　out　the　acknowledgment　with　great　punctuality；　and　set
  off　for　the　bankers'；　whilst　I　prepared　myself　for　departure　from
  this　abominable　prison。
  He　smiled　as　he　came　in。　　〃Well；〃　said　I；　〃you　have　touched　your
  money；　and　now；　I　must　tell　you；　that　you　are　the　most　infernal
  rogue　and　extortioner　I　ever　met　with。〃
  〃Oh；　no；　Mishter　Shtubbsh；〃　says　he；　grinning　still。　　〃Dere　is　som
  greater　roag　dan　me；mosh　greater。〃
  〃Fellow；〃　said　I；　〃don't　stand　grinning　before　a　gentleman；　but
  give　me　my　hat　and　cloak；　and　let　me　leave　your　filthy　den。〃
  〃Shtop；　Shtubbsh；〃　says　he；　not　even　Mistering　me　this　time。　　〃Here
  ish　a　letter；　vich　you　had　better　read。〃
  I　opened　the　letter；　something　fell　to　the　ground：it　was　my
  cheque。
  The　letter　ran　thus：　〃Messrs。　Child　and　Co。　present　their
  compliments　to　Captain　Stubbs；　and　regret　that　they　have　been
  obliged　to　refuse　payment　of　the　enclosed；　having　been　served　this
  day　with　an　attachment　by　Messrs。　Solomonson　and　Co。；　which　compels
  them　to　retain　Captain　Stubbs'　balance　of　2；010L。　11s。　6d。　until
  the　decision　of　the　suit　of　Solomonson　v。　Stubbs。
  〃FLEET　STREET。〃
  〃You　see；〃　says　Mr。　Nabb；　as　I　read　this　dreadful　letter〃you　see；
  Shtubbsh；　dere　vas　two　debts；a　little　von　and　a　big　von。　　So　dey
  arrested　you　for　de　little　von；　and　attashed　your　money　for　de　big
  von。〃
  Don't　laugh　at　me　for　telling　this　story。　　If　you　knew　what　tears
  are　blotting　over　the　paper　as　I　write　itif　you　knew　that　for
  weeks　after　I　was　more　like　a　madman　than　a　sane　man；a　madman　in
  the　Fleet　Prison；　where　I　went　instead　of　to　the　desert　island！
  What　had　I　done　to　deserve　it？　　Hadn't　I　always　kept　an　eye　to　the
  main　chance？　　Hadn't　I　lived　economically；　and　not　like　other　young
  men？　　Had　I　ever　been　known　to　squander　or　give　away　a　single
  penny？　　No！　　I　can　lay　my　hand　on　my　heart；　and；　thank　heaven；　say；
  No！　　Why；　why　was　I　punished　so？
  Let　me　conclude　this　miserable　history。　　Seven　monthsmy　wife　saw
  me　once　or　twice；　and　then　dropped　me　altogetherI　remained　in
  that　fatal　place。　　I　wrote　to　my　dear　mamma；　begging　her　to　sell
  her　furniture；　but　got　no　answer。　　All　my　old　friends　turned　their
  backs　upon　me。　　My　action　went　against　meI　had　not　a　penny　to
  defend　it。　　Solomonson　proved　my　wife's　debt；　and　seized　my　two
  thousand　pounds。　　As　for　the　detainer　against　me；　I　was　obliged　to
  go　through　the　court　for　the　relief　of　insolvent　debtors。　　I　passed
  through　it；　and　came　out　a　beggar。　　But　fancy　the　malice　of　that
  wicked　Stiffelkind：　he　appeared　in　court　as　my　creditor　for　3L。；
  with　sixteen　years'　interest　at　five　per　cent；　for　a　PAIR　OF　TOP…
  BOOTS。　　The　old　thief　produced　them　in　court；　and　told　the　whole
  storyLord　Cornwallis；　the　detection；　the　pumping　and　all。
  Commissioner　Dubobwig　was　very　funny　about　it。　　〃So　Doctor
  Swishtail　would　not　pay　you　for　the　boots；　eh；　Mr。　Stiffelkind？〃
  〃No：　he　said；　ven　I　asked　him　for　payment；　dey　was　ordered　by　a
  yong　boy；　and　I　ought　to　have　gone　to　his　schoolmaster。〃
  〃What！　then　you　came　on　a　BOOTLESS　errand；　ay；　sir？〃　　（A　laugh。）
  〃Bootless！　no　sare；　I　brought　de　boots　back　vid　me。　　How　de　devil
  else　could　I　show　dem　to　you？〃　　（Another　laugh。）
  〃You've　never　SOLED　'em　since；　Mr。　Tickleshins？〃
  〃I　never　would　sell　dem；　I　svore　I　never　vood；　on　porpus　to　be
  revenged　on　dat　Stobbs。〃
  〃What！　your　wound　has　never　been　HEALED；　eh？〃
  〃Vat　do　you　mean　vid　your　bootless　errands；　and　your　soling　and
  healing？　　I　tell　you　I　have　done　vat　I　svore　to　do：　I　have　exposed
  him　at　school；　I　have　broak　off　a　marriage　for　him；　ven　he　vould
  have　had　tventy　tousand　pound；　and　now　I　have　showed　him　up　in　a
  court　of　justice。　　Dat　is　vat　I　'ave　done；　and　dat's　enough。〃　　And
  then　the　old　wretch　went　down；　whilst　everybody　was　giggling　and
  staring　at　poor　meas　if　I　was　not　miserable　enough　already。
  〃This　seems　the　dearest　pair　of　boots　you　ever　had　in　your　life；
  Mr。　Stubbs；〃　said　Commissioner　Dubobwig　very　archly；　and　then　he
  began　to　inquire　about　the　rest　of　my　misfortunes。
  In　the　fulness　of　my　heart　I　told　him　the　whole　of　them：　how　Mr。
  Solomonson　the　attorney　had　introduced　me　to　the　rich　widow；　Mrs。
  Manasseh；　who　had　fifty　thousand　pounds；　and　an　estate　in　the　West
  Indies。　　How　I　was　married；　and　arrested　on　coming　to　town；　and
  cast　in　an　action　for　two　thousand　pounds　brought　against　me　by
  this　very　Solomonson　for　my　wife's　debts。
  〃Stop！〃　says　a　lawyer　in　the　court。　　〃Is　this　woman　a　showy　black…
  haired　woman　with　one　eye？　very　often　drunk；　with　three　children？
  Solomonson；　short；　with　red　hair？〃
  〃Exactly　so；〃　said　I；　with　tears　in　my　eyes。
  〃That　woman　has　married　THREE　MEN　within　the　last　two　years。　　One
  in　Ireland；　and　one　at　Bath。　　A　Solomonson　is；　I　believe；　her
  husband；　and　they　both　are　off　for　America　ten　days　ago。〃
  〃But　why　did　you　not　keep　your　2；000L。？〃　said　the　lawyer。
  〃Sir；　they　attached　it。〃
  〃Oh；　well；　we　may　pass　you。　　You　have　been　unlucky；　Mr。　Stubbs；　but
  it　seems　as　if　the　biter　had　been　bit　in　this　affair。〃
  〃No；〃　said　Mr。　Dubobwig。　　〃Mr。　Stubbs　is　the　victim　of　a　FATAL
  ATTACHMENT。〃
  NOVEMBER。A　GENERAL　POST　DELIVERY。
  I　was　a　free　man　when　I　went　out　of　the　Court；　but　I　was　a　beggar
  I；　Captain　Stubbs；　of　the　bold　North　Bungays；　did　not　know　where　I
  could　get　a　bed；　or　a　dinner。
  As　I　was　marching　sadly　down　Portugal　Street；　I　felt　a　hand　on　my
  shoulder　and　a　rough　voice　which　I　knew　well。
  〃Vell；　Mr。　Stobbs；　have　I　not　kept　my　promise？　　I　told　you　dem
  boots　would　be　your　ruin。〃
  I　was　much　too　miserable　to　reply；　and　only　cast　my　eyes　towards
  the　roofs　of　the　houses；　which　I　could　not　see　for　the　tears。
  〃Vat！　you　begin　to　gry　and　blobber　like　a　shild？　you　vood　marry；
  vood　you？　and　noting　vood　do　for　you　but　a　vife　vid　monnyha；　ha
  but　you　vere　de　pigeon；　and　she　was　de　grow。　　She　has　plocked　you；
  too；　pretty　velleh？　ha！　ha！〃
  〃Oh；　Mr。　Stiffelkind；〃　said　I；　〃don't　laugh　at　my　misery：　she　has
  not　left　me　a　single　shilling　under　heaven。　　And　I　shall　starve：　I
  do　believe　I　shall　starve。〃　　And　I　began　to　cry　fit　to　break　my
  heart。
  〃Starf！　stoff　and　nonsense！　　You　vill　never　die　of　starfingyou
  vill　die　of　HANGING；　I　tinkho！　ho！and　it　is　moch　easier　vay
  too。〃　　I　didn't　say　a　word；　but　cried　on；　till　everybody　in　the
  street　turned　round　and　stared。
  〃Come；　come；〃　said　Stiffelkind；　〃do　not　gry；　Gaptain　Stobbsit　is
  not　goot　for　a　Gaptain　to　gryha！　ha！　　Derecome　vid　me；　and　you
  shall　have　a　dinner；　and　a　bregfast　too；vich　shall　gost　you
  nothing；　until　you　can　bay　vid　your　earnings。〃
  And　so　this　curious　old　man；　who　had　persecuted　me　all　through　my
  prosperity；　grew　compassionate　towards　me　in　my　ill…luck；　and　took
  me　home　with　him　as　he　promised。　　〃I　saw　your　name　among　de
  Insolvents；　and　I　vowed；　you　know；　to　make　you　repent　dem　boots。
  Dere；　now；　it　is　done　and　forgotten；　look　you。　　Here；　Betty；
  Bettchen；　make　de　spare　bed；　and　put　a　clean　knife　and　fork；　Lort
  Cornvallis　is　come　to　dine　vid　me。〃
  I　lived　with　this　strange　old　man　for　six　weeks。　　I　kept　his　books；
  and　did　what　little　I　could　to　make　myself　useful：　carrying　about
  boots　and　shoes；　as　if　I　had　never　borne　his　Majesty's　commission。
  He　gave　me　no　money；　but　he　fed　and　lodged　me　comfortably。　　The　men
  and　boys　used　to　laugh；　and　call　me　General；　and　Lord　Cornwallis；
  and　all　sorts　of　nicknames；　and　old　Stiffelkind　made　a　thousand　new
  ones　for　me。
  One　day　I　can　recollectone　miserable　day；　as　I　was　polishing　on
  the　trees　a　pair　of　boots　of　Mr。　Stiffelkind's　manufacturethe　old
  gentleman　came　into　the　shop；　with　a　lady　on　his　arm。
  〃Vere　is　Gaptain　Stobbs？〃　said　he。　　〃Vere　is　dat　ornament　to　his
  Majesty's　service？〃
  I　came　in　from　the　back　shop；　where　I　was　polishing　the　boots；　with
  one　of　them　in　my　hand。
  〃Look；　my　dear；〃　says　he；　〃here　is　an　old　friend　of　yours；　his
  Excellency　Lort　Cornvallis！Who　would　have　thought　such　a　nobleman
  vood　turn　shoeblack？　　Captain　Stobbs；　here　is　your　former　flame；　my
  dear　niece；　Miss　Grotty。　　How　could　you；　Magdalen；　ever　leaf　such　a
  lof　of　a　man？　　Shake　hands　vid　her；　Gaptain；dere；　never　mind　de
  blacking！〃　　But　Miss　drew　back。
  〃I　never　shake　hands　with　a　SHOEBLACK；〃　said　she；　mighty
  contemptuous。
  〃Bah！　my　lof；　his　fingers　von't　soil　you。　　Don't　you　know　he　has
  just　been　VITEVASHED？〃
  〃I　wish；　uncle；〃　says　she；　〃you　would　not　leave　me　w