the　feshionable　inthroduction　to　her　leddyship。
  〃Is　it　there　ye　are？〃　said　I　thin　to　mesilf；　〃and　it's　thrue　for　you；
  Pathrick；　that　ye're　the　fortunittest　mortal　in　life。　We'll　soon　see　now
  whither　it's　your　swate　silf；　or　whither　it's　little　Mounseer
  Maiter…di…dauns；　that　Misthress　Tracle　is　head　and　ears　in　the　love　wid。〃
  Wid　that　we　wint　aff　to　the　widdy's；　next　door；　and　ye　may　well　say　it　was
  an　illigant　place；　so　it　was。　There　was　a　carpet　all　over　the　floor；　and
  in　one　corner　there　was　a　forty…pinny　and　a　Jew's　harp　and　the　divil　knows
  what　ilse；　and　in　another　corner　was　a　sofy；　the　beautifullest　thing　in
  all　natur；　and　sitting　on　the　sofy；　sure　enough；　there　was　the　swate
  little　angel；　Misthress　Tracle。
  〃The　tip　o'　the　mornin'　to　ye；〃　says　I；　〃Mrs。　Tracle；〃　and　thin　I　made
  sich　an　illigant　obaysance　that　it　wud　ha　quite　althegither　bewildered　the
  brain　o'　ye。
  〃Wully　woo；　pully　woo；　plump　in　the　mud；〃　says　the　little　furrenner
  Frinchman；　〃and　sure　Mrs。　Tracle；〃　says　he；　that　he　did；　〃isn't　this
  gintleman　here　jist　his　reverence　Sir　Pathrick　O'Grandison；　Barronitt；　and
  isn't　he　althegither　and　entirely　the　most　particular　frind　and
  acquaintance　that　I　have　in　the　houl　world？〃
  And　wid　that　the　widdy；　she　gits　up　from　the　sofy；　and　makes　the　swatest
  curthchy　nor　iver　was　seen；　and　thin　down　she　sits　like　an　angel；　and
  thin；　by　the　powers；　it　was　that　little　spalpeen　Mounseer　Maiter…di…dauns
  that　plumped　his　silf　right　down　by　the　right　side　of　her。　Och　hon！　I
  ixpicted　the　two　eyes　o'　me　wud　ha　cum'd　out　of　my　head　on　the　spot；　I　was
  so　dispirate　mad！　Howiver；　〃Bait　who！〃　says　I；　after　awhile。　〃Is　it　there
  ye　are；　Mounseer　Maiter…di…dauns？〃　and　so　down　I　plumped　on　the　lift　side
  of　her　leddyship；　to　be　aven　with　the　willain。　Botheration！　it　wud　ha　done
  your　heart　good　to　percave　the　illigant　double　wink　that　I　gived　her　jist
  thin　right　in　the　face　with　both　eyes。
  But　the　little　ould　Frinchman　he　niver　beginned　to　suspict　me　at　all　at
  all；　and　disperate　hard　it　was　he　made　the　love　to　her　leddyship。　〃Woully
  wou；〃　says　he；　Pully　wou；〃　says　he；　〃Plump　in　the　mud；〃　says　he。
  〃That's　all　to　no　use；　Mounseer　Frog；　mavourneen；〃　thinks　I；　and　I　talked
  as　hard　and　as　fast　as　I　could　all　the　while；　and　throth　it　was　mesilf
  jist　that　divarted　her　leddyship　complately　and　intirely；　by　rason　of　the
  illigant　conversation　that　I　kipt　up　wid　her　all　about　the　dear　bogs　of
  Connaught。　And　by　and　by　she　gived　me　such　a　swate　smile；　from　one　ind　of
  her　mouth　to　the　ither；　that　it　made　me　as　bould　as　a　pig；　and　I　jist　took
  hould　of　the　ind　of　her　little　finger　in　the　most　dillikitest　manner　in
  natur；　looking　at　her　all　the　while　out　o'　the　whites　of　my　eyes。
  And　then　ounly　percave　the　cuteness　of　the　swate　angel；　for　no　sooner　did
  she　obsarve　that　I　was　afther　the　squazing　of　her　flipper；　than　she　up　wid
  it　in　a　jiffy；　and　put　it　away　behind　her　back；　jist　as　much　as　to　say；
  〃Now　thin；　Sir　Pathrick　O'Grandison；　there's　a　bitther　chance　for　ye；
  mavourneen；　for　it's　not　altogether　the　gentaal　thing　to　be　afther　the
  squazing　of　my　flipper　right　full　in　the　sight　of　that　little　furrenner
  Frinchman；　Mounseer　Maiter…di…dauns。〃
  Wid　that　I　giv'd　her　a　big　wink　jist　to　say；　〃lit　Sir　Pathrick　alone　for
  the　likes　o'　them　thricks；〃　and　thin　I　wint　aisy　to　work；　and　you'd　have
  died　wid　the　divarsion　to　behould　how　cliverly　I　slipped　my　right　arm
  betwane　the　back　o'　the　sofy；　and　the　back　of　her　leddyship；　and　there；
  sure　enough；　I　found　a　swate　little　flipper　all　a　waiting　to　say；　〃the　tip
  o'　the　mornin'　to　ye；　Sir　Pathrick　O'Grandison；　Barronitt。〃　And　wasn't　it
  mesilf；　sure；　that　jist　giv'd　it　the　laste　little　bit　of　a　squaze　in　the
  world；　all　in　the　way　of　a　commincement；　and　not　to　be　too　rough　wid　her
  leddyship？　and　och；　botheration；　wasn't　it　the　gentaalest　and　dilikittest
  of　all　the　little　squazes　that　I　got　in　return？　〃Blood　and　thunder；　Sir
  Pathrick；　mavourneen；〃　thinks　I　to　mesilf；　〃fait　it's　jist　the　mother's
  son　of　you；　and　nobody　else　at　all　at　all；　that's　the　handsomest　and　the
  fortunittest　young　bog…throtter　that　ever　cum'd　out　of　Connaught！〃　And
  with　that　I　givd　the　flipper　a　big　squaze；　and　a　big　squaze　it　was；　by　the
  powers；　that　her　leddyship　giv'd　to　me　back。　But　it　would　ha　split　the
  seven　sides　of　you　wid　the　laffin'　to　behould；　jist　then　all　at　once；　the
  consated　behavior　of　Mounseer　Maiter…di…dauns。　The　likes　o'　sich　a
  jabbering；　and　a　smirking；　and　a　parley…wouing　as　he　begin'd　wid　her
  leddyship；　niver　was　known　before　upon　arth；　and　divil　may　burn　me　if　it
  wasn't　me　own　very　two　peepers　that　cotch'd　him　tipping　her　the　wink　out
  of　one　eye。　Och；　hon！　if　it　wasn't　mesilf　thin　that　was　mad　as　a　Kilkenny
  cat　I　shud　like　to　be　tould　who　it　was！
  〃Let　me　infarm　you；　Mounseer　Maiter…di…dauns；〃　said　I；　as　purlite　as　iver
  ye　seed；　〃that　it's　not　the　gintaal　thing　at　all　at　all；　and　not　for　the
  likes　o'　you　inny　how；　to　be　afther　the　oggling　and　a　goggling　at　her
  leddyship　in　that　fashion；〃　and　jist　wid　that　such　another　squaze　as　it
  was　I　giv'd　her　flipper；　all　as　much　as　to　say；　〃isn't　it　Sir　Pathrick
  now；　my　jewel；　that'll　be　able　to　the　proticting　o'　you；　my　darlint？〃　and
  then　there　cum'd　another　squaze　back；　all　by　way　of　the　answer。　〃Thrue　for
  you；　Sir　Pathrick；〃　it　said　as　plain　as　iver　a　squaze　said　in　the　world；
  〃Thrue　for　you；　Sir　Pathrick；　mavourneen；　and　it's　a　proper　nate　gintleman
  ye　are　　that's　God's　truth；〃　and　with　that　she　opened　her　two　beautiful
  peepers　till　I　belaved　they　wud　ha'　cum'd　out　of　her　hid　althegither　and
  intirely；　and　she　looked　first　as　mad　as　a　cat　at　Mounseer　Frog；　and　thin
  as　smiling　as　all　out　o'　doors　at　mesilf。
  〃Thin；〃　says　he；　the　willian；　〃Och　hon！　and　a　wolly…wou；　pully…wou；〃　and
  then　wid　that　he　shoved　up　his　two　shoulders　till　the　divil　the　bit　of　his
  hid　was　to　be　diskivered；　and　then　he　let　down　the　two　corners　of　his
  purraty…trap；　and　thin　not　a　haporth　more　of　the　satisfaction　could　I　git
  out　o'　the　spalpeen。
  Belave　me；　my　jewel；　it　was　Sir　Pathrick　that　was　unreasonable　mad　thin；
  and　the　more　by　token　that　the　Frinchman　kipt　an　wid　his　winking　at　the
  widdy；　and　the　widdy　she　kept　an　wid　the　squazing　of　my　flipper；　as　much
  as　to　say；　〃At　him　again；　Sir　Pathrick　O'Grandison；　mavourneen：〃　so　I　just
  ripped　out　wid　a　big　oath；　and　says　I；
  〃Ye　little　spalpeeny　frog　of　a　bog…throtting　son　of　a　bloody　noun！〃　　and
  jist　thin　what　d'ye　think　it　was　that　her　leddyship　did？　Troth　she　jumped
  up　from　the　sofy　as　if　she　was　bit；　and　made　off　through　the　door；　while　I
  turned　my　head　round　afther　her；　in　a　complate　bewilderment　and
  botheration；　and　followed　her　wid　me　two　peepers。　You　percave　I　had　a
  reason　of　my　own　for　knowing　that　she　couldn't　git　down　the　stares
  althegither　and　intirely；　for　I　knew　very　well　that　I　had　hould　of　her
  hand；　for　the　divil　the　bit　had　I　iver　lit　it　go。　And　says　I；　〃Isn't　it
  the　laste　little　bit　of　a　mistake　in　the　world　that　ye've　been　afther　the
  making；　yer　leddyship？　Come　back　now；　that's　a　darlint；　and　I'll　give　ye
  yur　flipper。〃　But　aff　she　wint　down　the　stairs　like　a　shot；　and　thin　I
  turned　round　to　the　little　Frinch　furrenner。　Och　hon！　if　it　wasn't　his
  spalpeeny　little　paw　that　I　had　hould　of　in　my　own　　why　thin　　thin　it
  wasn't　　that's　all。
  And　maybe　it　wasn't　mesilf　that　jist　died　then　outright　wid　the　laffin'；
  to　behold　the　little　chap　when　he　found　out　that　it　wasn't　the　widdy　at
  all　at　all　that　he　had　had　hould　of　all　the　time；　but　only　Sir　Pathrick
  O'Grandison。　The　ould　divil　himself　niver　behild　sich　a　long　face　as　he
  pet　an！　As　for　Sir　Pathrick　O'Grandison；　Barronitt；　it　wasn't　for　the
  likes　of　his　riverence　to　be　afther　the　minding　of　a　thrifle　of　a　mistake。
  Ye　may　jist　say；　though　（for　it's　God's　thruth）；　that　afore　I　left　hould
  of　the　flipper　of　the　spalpeen　（which　was　not　till　afther　her　leddyship's
  futman　had　kicked　us　both　down　the　stairs；　I　giv'd　it　such　a　nate　little
  broth　of　a　squaze　as　made　it　all　up　into　raspberry　jam。
  〃Woully　wou；〃　says　he；　〃pully　wou；〃　says　he　　〃Cot　tam！〃
  And　that's　jist　the　thruth　of　the　rason　why　he　wears　his　lift　hand　in　a
  sling。
  ~~~　End　of　Text　~~~
  BON…BON。
  _　　　　　　　　　Quand　un　bon　vin　meuble　mon　estomac；
  Je　suis　plus　savant　que　Balzac　…
  Plus　sage　que　Pibrac　；
  Mon　brass　seul　faisant　l'attaque
  De　la　nation　Coseaque；
  La　mettroit　au　sac　；
  De　Charon　je　passerois　le　lac；
  En　dormant　dans　son　bac　；
  J'irois　au　fier　Eac；
  Sans　que　mon　c渦r　fit　tic　ni　tac；
  Pr閟enter　du　tabac。
  French　Vaudeville_
  THAT　Pierre　Bon…Bon　was　a　_restaurateur_　of　uncommon　qualifications；
  no　man　who；　during　the　reign　of　…；　frequented　the　little　C鈌？in　the
  cul…de…sac　Le　Febvre　at　Rouen；　will；　I　imagine；　feel　himself　at　liberty　to
  dispute。　That　Pierre　Bon…Bon　was；　in　an　equal　degree；　skilled　in　the
  philosophy　of　that　period　is；　I　presume；　still　more　especially　undeniable。
  His　_pat閟　？la　fois_　were　beyond　doubt　immaculate；　but　what　pen　can　do
  justice　to　his　essays　_sur　la　Nature_　…　his　thoughts　sur　_l'Ame_　…　his
  observations　_sur　l'Esprit　？_　If　his　_omelettes_　…　if　his　_fricandeaux_