第 20 节
作者:片片      更新:2021-02-20 15:13      字数:9322
  quarrelled violently to collect his debts instead of one of his own
  beloved Boers; I am sure I do not know。  I will go and write to him。
  Allan; see that the messenger and his horse get something to eat。〃
  I nodded and went to the man; who was one of those that had defended
  Maraisfontein with me; a good fellow unless he got near liquor。
  〃Heer Allan;〃 he said; looking round to see that we were not overheard;
  〃I have a little writing for you also;〃 and be produced from his pouch a
  note that was unaddressed。
  I tore it open eagerly。  Within was written in French; which no Boer
  would understand if the letter fell into his hands:
  〃Be brave and faithful; and remember; as I shall。  Oh! love of my heart;
  adieu; adieu!〃
  This message was unsigned; but what need was there of signature?
  I wrote an answer of a sort that may be imagined; though what the exact
  words were I cannot remember after the lapse of nearly half a century。
  Oddly enough; it is the things I said which I recall at such a distance
  of time rather than the things which I wrote; perhaps because; when once
  written; my mind being delivered; troubled itself with them no more。  So
  in due course the Hottentot departed with my father's letter and my own;
  and that was the last direct communication which we had with Henri or
  Marie Marais for more than a year。
  I think that those long months were on the whole the most wretched I
  have ever spent。  The time of life which I was passing through is always
  trying; that period of emergence from youth into full and responsible
  manhood which in Africa generally takes place earlier than it does here
  in England; where young men often seem to me to remain boys up to
  five…and…twenty。  The circumstances which I have detailed made it
  particularly so in my own case; for here was I; who should have been but
  a cheerful lad; oppressed with the sorrows and anxieties; and fettered
  by the affections of maturity。
  I could not get Marie out of my mind; her image was with me by day and
  by night; especially by night; which caused me to sleep badly。  I became
  morose; supersensitive; and excitable。  I developed a cough; and
  thought; as did others; that I was going into a decline。  I remember
  that Hans even asked me once if I would not come and peg out the exact
  place where I should like to be buried; so that I might be sure that
  there would be no mistake made when I could no longer speak for myself。
  On that occasion I kicked Hans; one of the few upon which I have ever
  touched a native。  The truth was that I had not the slightest intention
  of being buried。  I wanted to live and marry Marie; not to die and be
  put in a hole by Hans。  Only I saw no prospect of marrying Marie; or
  even of seeing her again; and that was why I felt low…spirited。
  Of course; from time to time news of the trek…Boers reached us; but it
  was extremely confused。  There were so many parties of them; their
  adventures were so difficult to follow; and; I may add; often so
  terrible; so few of them could write; trustworthy messengers were so
  scanty; distances were so great。  At any rate; we heard nothing of
  Marais's band except a rumour that they had trekked to a district in
  what is now the Transvaal; which is called Rustenberg; and thence on
  towards Delagoa Bay into an unknown veld where they had vanished。  From
  Marie herself no letter came; which showed me clearly enough that she
  had not found an opportunity of sending one。
  Observing my depressed condition; my father suggested as a remedy that I
  should go to the theological college at Cape Town and prepare myself for
  ordination。  But the Church as a career did not appeal to me; perhaps
  because I felt that I could never be sufficiently good; perhaps because
  I knew that as a clergyman I should find no opportunity of travelling
  north when my call came。  For I always believed that this call would
  come。
  My father; who wished that I should hear another kind of call; was vexed
  with me over this matter。  He desired earnestly that I should follow the
  profession which he adorned; and indeed saw no other open for me any
  more than I did myself。  Of course he was right in a way; seeing that in
  the end I found none; unless big game hunting and Kaffir trading can be
  called a profession。  I don't know; I am sure。  Still; poor business as
  it may be; I say now when I am getting towards the end of life that I am
  glad I did not follow any other。  It has suited me; that was the
  insignificant hole in the world's affairs which I was destined to fit;
  whose only gifts were a remarkable art of straight shooting and the more
  common one of observation mixed with a little untrained philosophy。
  So hot did our arguments become about this subject of the Church; for;
  as may be imagined; in the course of them I revealed some unorthodoxy;
  especially as regards the matter of our methods of Christianising
  Kaffirs; that I was extremely thankful when a diversion occurred which
  took me away from home。  The story of my defence of Maraisfontein had
  spread far; and that of my feats of shooting; especially in the Goose
  Kloof; still farther。  So the end of it was that those in authority
  commandeered me to serve in one of the continual Kaffir frontier wars
  which was in progress; and instantly gave me a commission as a kind of
  lieutenant in a border corps。
  Now the events of that particular war have nothing to do with the
  history that I am telling; so I do not propose even to touch on them。  I
  served in it for a year; meeting with many adventures; one or two
  successes; and several failures。  Once I was wounded slightly; twice I
  but just escaped with my life。  Once I was reprimanded for taking a
  foolish risk and losing some men。  Twice I was commended for what were
  called gallant actions; such as bringing a wounded comrade out of danger
  under a warm fire; mostly of assegais; and penetrating by night; almost
  alone; into the stronghold of a chieftain; and shooting him。
  At length that war was patched up with an inconclusive peace and my
  corps was disbanded。  I returned home; no longer a lad; but a man with
  experience of various kinds and a rather unique knowledge of Kaffirs;
  their languages; history; and modes of thought and action。  Also I had
  associated a good deal with British officers; and from them acquired
  much that I had found no opportunity of studying before; especially; I
  hope; the ideas and standards of English gentlemen。
  I had not been back at the Mission Station more than three weeks; quite
  long enough for me to begin to be bored with idleness and inactivity;
  when that call for which I had been waiting came at last。
  One day a 〃smous〃; that is a low kind of white man; often a Jew; who
  travels about trading with unsophisticated Boers and Kaffirs; and
  cheating them if he can; called at the station with his cartful of
  goods。  I was about to send him away; having no liking for such gentry;
  when he asked me if I were named Allan Quatermain。  I said 〃Yes;〃
  whereon he replied that he had a letter for me; and produced a packet
  wrapped up in sail…cloth。  I asked him whence he had it; and he answered
  from a man whom he had met at Port Elizabeth; an east coast trader; who;
  hearing that he was coming into the Cradock district; entrusted him with
  the letter。  The man told him that it was very important; and that I
  should reward the bearer well if it were delivered safely。
  While the Jew talked (I think he was a Jew) I was opening the
  sail…cloth。  Within was a piece of linen which had been oiled to keep
  out water; addressed in some red pigment to myself or my father。  This;
  too; I opened; not without difficulty; for it was carefully sewn up; and
  found within it a letter…packet; also addressed to myself or my father;
  in the handwriting of Marie。
  Great Heaven!  How my heart jumped at that sight!  Calling to Hans to
  make the smous comfortable and give him food; I went into my own room;
  and there read the letter; which ran thus:
  〃MY DEAR ALLAN;I do not know whether the other letters I have written
  to you have ever come to your hands; or indeed if this one will。  Still;
  I send it on chance by a wandering Portuguese half…breed who is going to
  Delagoa Bay; about fifty miles; I believe; from the place where I now
  write; near the Crocodile River。  My father has named it Maraisfontein;
  after our old home。  If those letters reached you; you will have learned
  of the terrible things we went through on our journey; the attacks by
  the Kaffirs in the Zoutpansberg region; who destroyed one of our parties
  altogether; and so forth。  If not; all that story must wait; for it is
  too long to tell now; and; indeed; I have but little paper; and not much
  pencil。  It will be enough to say; therefore; that to the number of
  thirty…five white people; men; women and children; we trekked at the
  beginning of the summer season; when the grass was commencing to grow;
  from