第 37 节
作者:风雅颂      更新:2021-02-19 01:01      字数:9322
  got into bed。 He was already thoroughly ill when the doctor arrived。 〃Forgive my sending for you;〃 he said。 〃Not your line。 I know。 。 。 。 My wife's G。P。an exasperating sort of ass。 Can't stand him。 No one else。〃 He was lying on a narrow little bed with a hard pillow that the doctor replaced by one from Lady Hardy's room。 He had twisted the bed…clothes into a hopeless muddle; the sheet was on the floor。 Sir Richmond's bedroom was a large apartment in which sleep seemed to have been an admitted necessity rather than a principal purpose。 On one hand it opened into a business…like dressing and bath room; on the other into the day study。 It bore witness to the nocturnal habits of a man who had long lived a life of irregular impulses to activity and dislocated hours and habits。 There was a desk and reading lamp for night work near the fireplace; an electric kettle for making tea at night; a silver biscuit tin; all the apparatus for the lonely intent industry of the small hours。 There was a bookcase of bluebooks; books of reference and suchlike material; and some files。 Over the mantelpiece was an enlarged photograph of Lady Hardy and a plain office calendar。 The desk was littered with the galley proofs of the Minority Report upon which Sir Richmond had been working up to the moment of his hasty retreat to bed。 And lying among the proofs; as though it had been taken out and looked at quite recently was the photograph of a girl。 For a moment Dr。 Martineau's mind hung in doubt and then he knew it for the young American of Stonehenge。 How that affair had ended he did not know。 And now it was not his business to know。 These various observations printed themselves on Dr。 Martineau's mind after his first cursory examination of his patient and while he cast about for anything that would give this large industrious apartment a little more of the restfulness and comfort of a sick room。 〃I must get in a night nurse at once;〃 he said。 〃We must find a small table somewhere to put near the bed。 〃I am afraid you are very ill;〃 he said; returning to the bedside。 〃This is not; as you say; my sort of work。 Will you let me call in another man; a man we can trust thoroughly; to consult?〃 〃I'm in your hands; said Sir Richmond。 I want to pull through。〃 〃He will know better where to get the right sort of nurse for the caseand everything。〃 The second doctor presently came; with the right sort of nurse hard on his heels。 Sir Richmond submitted almost silently to his expert handling and was sounded and looked to and listened at。 〃H'm;〃 said the second doctor; and then encouragingly to Sir Richmond: 〃We've got to take care of you。 〃There's a lot about this I don't like;〃 said the second doctor and drew Dr。 Martineau by the arm towards the study。 For a moment or so Sir Richmond listened to the low murmur of their voices; but he did not feel very deeply interested in what they were saying。 He began to think what a decent chap Dr。 Martineau was; how helpful and fine and forgiving his professional training had made him; how completely he had ignored the smothered incivilities of their parting at Salisbury。 All men ought to have some such training; Not a bad idea to put every boy and girl through a year or so of hospital service。 。 。 。 Sir Richmond must have dozed; for his next perception was of Dr。 Martineau standing over him and saying 〃I am afraid; my dear Hardy; that you are very ill indeed。 Much more so than I thought you were at first。〃 Sir Richmond's raised eyebrows conveyed that he accepted this fact。 〃I think Lady Hardy ought to be sent for。〃 Sir Richmond shook his head with unexpected vigour。 〃Don't want her about;〃 he said; and after a pause; 〃Don't want anybody about。〃 〃But if anything happens…?〃 〃Send then。〃 An expression of obstinate calm overspread Sir Richmond's face。 He seemed to regard the matter as settled。 He closed his eyes。 For a time Dr。 Martineau desisted。 He went to the window and turned to look again at the impassive figure on the bed。 Did Sir Richmond fully understand? He made a step towards his patient and hesitated。 Then he brought a chair and sat down at the bedside。 Sir Richmond opened his eyes and regarded him with a slight frown。 〃A case of pneumonia;〃 said the doctor; 〃after great exertion and fatigue; may take very rapid and unexpected turns。〃 Sir Richmond; cheek on pillow; seemed to assent。 〃I think if you want to be sure that Lady Hardy sees you again 。 。 。 If you don't want to take risks about that。 。 。 One never knows in these cases。 Probably there is a night train。〃 Sir Richmond manifested no surprise at the warning。 But he stuck to his point。 His voice was faint but firm。 〃Couldn't make up anything to say to her。 Anything she'd like。〃 Dr。 Martineau rested on that for a little while。 Then he said: 〃If there is anyone else?〃 〃Not possible;〃 said Sir Richmond; with his eyes on the ceiling。 〃But to see?〃 Sir Richmond turned his head to Dr。 Martineau。 His face puckered like a peevish child's。 〃They'd want things said to them。。。Things to remember。。。I CAN'T。 I'm tired out。〃 〃Don't trouble;〃 whispered Dr。 Martineau; suddenly remorseful。 But Sir Richmond was also remorseful。 〃Give them my love;〃 he said。 〃Best love。。。Old Martin。 Love。〃 Dr。 Martineau was turning away when Sir Richmond spoke again in a whisper。 〃Best love。。。Poor at the best。 。 。 。〃 He dozed for a time。 Then he made a great effort。 〃I can't see them; Martineau; until I've something to say。 It's like that。 Perhaps I shall think of some kind things to sayafter a sleep。 But if they came now。。。I'd say something wrong。 Be cross perhaps。 Hurt someone。 I've hurt so many。 People exaggerate。。。People exaggerateimportance these occasions。〃 〃Yes; yes;〃 whispered Dr。 Martineau。 〃I quite understand。〃 Section 4 For a time Sir Richmond dozed。 Then he stirred and muttered。 〃Second rate。 。 。 Poor at the best。 。 。 Love。 。 。 Work。 All。 。 。〃 〃It had been splendid work;〃 said Dr。 Martineau; and was not sure that Sir Richmond heard。 〃Those last few days。 。 。 lost my grip。 。 。 Always lose my damned grip。 〃Ragged them。 。 。 。 Put their backs up 。 。 。 。Silly。。。。 〃Never。。。。 Never done anythingWELL 。。。。 〃It's done。 Done。 Well or ill。。。。 〃Done。〃 His voice sank to the faintest whisper。 〃Done for ever and ever 。。。 and ever 。 。 。 and ever。〃 Again he seemed to doze。 Dr。 Martineau stood up softly。 Something beyond reason told him that this was certainly a dying man。 He was reluctant to go and he had an absurd desire that someone; someone for whom Sir Richmond cared; should come and say good…bye to him; and for Sir Richmond to say good…bye to someone。 He hated this lonely launching from the shores of life of one who had sought intimacy so persistently and vainly。 It was extraordinaryhe saw it now for the first timehe loved this man。 If it had been in his power; he would at that moment have anointed him with kindness。 The doctor found himself standing in front of the untidy writing desk; littered like a recent battlefield。 The photograph of the American girl drew his eyes。 What had happened? Was there not perhaps some word for her? He turned about as if to enquire of the dying man and found Sir Richmond's eyes open and regarding him。 In them he saw an expression he had seen there once or twice before; a faint but excessively irritating gleam of amusement。 〃Oh!WELL!〃 said Dr。 Martineau and turned away。 He went to the window and stared out as his habit was。 Sir Richmond continued to smile dimly at the doctor's back until his eyes closed again。 It was their last exchange。 Sir Richmond died that night in the small hours; so quietly that for some time the night nurse did not observe what had happened。 She was indeed roused to that realization by the ringing of the telephone bell in the adjacent study。 Section 5 For a long time that night Dr。 Martineau had lain awake unable to sleep。 He was haunted by the figure of Sir Richmond lying on his uncomfortable little bed in his big bedroom and by the curious effect of loneliness produced by the nocturnal desk and by the evident dread felt by Sir Richmond of any death…bed partings。 He realized how much this man; who had once sought so feverishly for intimacies; had shrunken back upon himself; how solitary his motives had become; how rarely he had taken counsel with anyone in his later years。 His mind now dwelt apart。 Even if people came about him he would still be facing death alone。 And so it seemed he meant to slip out of life; as a man might slip out of a crowded assembly; unobserved。 Even now he might be going。 The doctor recalled how he and Sir Richmond had talked of the rage of life in a young baby; how we drove into life in a sort of fury; how that rage impelled us to do this and that; how we fought and struggled until the rage spent itself and was gone。 That eddy of rage that was Sir Richmond was now perhaps very near its end。 Presently it would fade and cease; and the stream that had made it and borne it would know it no more。 Dr。 Martineau's thoughts relaxed and passed into the picture land of dreams。 He saw the figure of Sir Richmond; going as it were away from him along a narrow path; a path that followed the crest of a ridge; between great darknesses; enormous cloudy darknesses; above him and below。 He was going along this path without looking back; without a thought