第 48 节
作者:月寒      更新:2024-04-14 09:15      字数:9322
  I   had  looked    forward    to  spending   Christmas      with   some   people    in
  Suffolk;   and   every   one   in   London   assured   me   that   at   their   house   there
  would be the kind of a Christmas house party you hear about but see only
  in    the    illustrated    Christmas      numbers。      They     promised      mistletoe;
  snapdragon; and Sir Roger de Coverley。 On Christmas morning we would
  walk to church; after luncheon we would shoot; after dinner we would eat
  plum   pudding   floating   in   blazing   brandy;   dance   with   the   servants;   and
  listen to the waits singing 〃God rest you; merry gentlemen; let nothing you
  dismay。〃
  To a lone American bachelor stranded in London it sounded fine。 And
  in my gratitude I had already shipped to my hostess; for her children; of
  whose age; number; and sex I was ignorant; half of Gamage's dolls; skees;
  and cricket bats; and those crackers that; when you pull them; sometimes
  explode。 But it was not to be。 Most inconsiderately my wealthiest patient
  gained sufficient courage to consent to an operation; and in all New York
  would permit no one to lay violent hands upon him save myself。 By cable
  I   advised    postponement。       Having     lived   in  lawful    harmony      with   his
  appendix for  fifty  years; I  thought;  for one  week longer he   might   safely
  maintain the status quo。 But his cable in reply was an ultimatum。 So; on
  Christmas   eve;   instead   of   Hallam   Hall   and   a   Yule   log;   I   was   in   a   gale
  plunging and pitching off the coast of Ireland; and the only log on board
  was the one the captain kept to himself。
  I sat in the smoking…room; depressed and cross; and it must have been
  on the principle that misery loves company that I foregathered with Talbot;
  or   rather   that   Talbot   foregathered     with   me。   Certainty;    under    happier
  conditions and in haunts of men more crowded; the open…faced manner in
  which he forced himself upon me would have put me on my guard。 But;
  either out of deference to the holiday spirit; as manifested in the fictitious
  gayety   of   our   few   fellow…passengers;   or   because   the      young   man   in    a
  knowing;      impertinent    way   was    most    amusing;    I  listened   to  him   from
  dinner   time   until   midnight;   when   the   chief   officer;   hung   with   snow   and
  icicles; was blown in from the deck and wished all a merry Christmas。
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  Even     after  they   unmasked      Talbot    I  had   neither   the  heart   nor   the
  inclination   to   turn   him   down。   Indeed;   had   not   some   of   the   passengers
  testified that I belonged to a different profession; the smoking…room crowd
  would have quarantined me as his accomplice。 On the first night I met him
  I was not certain whether he was English or giving an imitation。 All the
  outward and visible signs were English; but he told me that; though he had
  been   educated   at   Oxford   and   since   then   had   spent   most   of   his   years   in
  India; playing polo; he was an American。 He seemed to have spent much
  time; and according to himself much money; at the French watering…places
  and on the Riviera。 I felt sure that it was in France I had already seen him;
  but where I could not recall。 He was hard to place。 Of people at home and
  in London well worth knowing he talked glibly; but in speaking of them he
  made several slips。 It was his taking the trouble to cover up the slips that
  first made me wonder if his talking about himself was not mere vanity; but
  had some special object。 I felt he was presenting letters of introduction in
  order   that   later   he   might   ask   a   favor。   Whether   he   was   leading   up   to   an
  immediate   loan;   or   in   New   York   would   ask   for   a   card   to   a   club;   or   an
  introduction to a banker; I could not tell。 But in forcing himself upon me;
  except in self…interest; I could think of no other motive。 The next evening I
  discovered the motive。
  He was in the smoking…room playing solitaire; and at once I recalled
  that it was at Aix…les…Bains I had first seen him; and that he held a bank at
  baccarat。 When he asked me to sit down I said: 〃I saw you last summer at
  Aix…les…Bains。〃
  His   eyes   fell   to   the pack   in   his hands   and   apparently  searched it   for
  some particular card。
  〃What was I doing?〃 he asked。
  〃Dealing baccarat at the Casino des Fleurs。〃
  With obvious relief he laughed。
  〃Oh;   yes;〃   he   assented;   〃jolly   place; Aix。   But   I   lost   a   pot   of   money
  there。 I'm a rotten hand at cards。 Can't win; and can't leave 'em alone。〃 As
  though for this weakness; so frankly confessed; he begged me to excuse
  him; he smiled appealingly。 〃Poker; bridge; chemin de fer; I like 'em all;〃
  he rattled on; 〃but they don't like me。 So I stick to solitaire。 It's dull; but
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  cheap。〃   He   shuffled   the   cards   clumsily。 As   though   making   conversation;
  he asked: 〃You care for cards yourself?〃
  I told him truthfully I did not know the difference between a club and a
  spade and had no curiosity to learn。 At this; when he found he had been
  wasting time on me; I expected him to show some sign of annoyance; even
  of irritation; but his disappointment struck far deeper。 As though I had hurt
  him physically; he shut his eyes; and when again he opened them I saw in
  them   distress。   For   the   moment   I   believe   of   my   presence   he   was   utterly
  unconscious。 His hands lay idle upon the table; like a man facing a crisis;
  he   stared   before   him。   Quite   improperly;   I   felt   sorry   for   him。   In   me   he
  thought   he   had   found   a   victim;   and   that   the   loss   of   the   few   dollars   he
  might have won should so deeply disturb him showed his need was great。
  Almost at once he abandoned me and I went on deck。 When I returned an
  hour later to the smoking…room he was deep in a game of poker。
  As I passed he hailed me gayly。
  〃Don't scold; now;〃 he laughed; 〃you know I can't keep away from it。〃
  From   his   manner   those   at   the   table   might   have   supposed   we   were
  friends of long and happy companionship。 I stopped behind his chair; but
  he   thought   I   had   passed;   and   in   reply   to   one   of   the   players   answered:
  〃Known him for years; he's set me right many a time。 When I broke my
  right   femur   'chasin;'   he   got   me   back   in   the   saddle   in   six   weeks。 All   my
  people swear by him。〃
  One of the players   smiled up at   me; and Talbot   turned。 But his   eyes
  met mine with perfect serenity。 He even held up his cards for me to see。
  〃What would you draw?〃 he asked。
  His audacity so astonished me that in silence I could only stare at him
  and walk on。
  When   on   deck   he   met   me   he   was   not   even   apologetic。   Instead;   as
  though we were partners in crime; he chuckled delightedly。
  〃Sorry;〃 he said。 〃Had to do it。 They weren't very keen at my taking a
  hand; so I had to use your name。 But I'm all right now;〃 he assured me。
  〃They think   you vouched   for me;  and to…night they're going   to raise the
  limit。 I've convinced them I'm an easy mark。〃
  〃And I take it you are not;〃 I said stiffly。
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  He considered this unworthy of an answer and only smiled。 Then the
  smile   died;   and   again   in   his   eyes   I   saw   distress;   infinite   weariness;   and
  fear。
  As though his thoughts drove him to seek protection; he came closer。
  〃I'm  'in   bad;' doctor;〃   he   said。  His   voice   was   frightened;   bewildered;
  like   that   of   a   child。   〃I   can't   sleep;   nerves   all   on   the   loose。   I   don't   think
  straight。 I hear voices; and no one around。 I hear knockings at the  door;
  and when I open it; no one there。 If I don't keep fit I can't work; and this
  trip   I   got   to   make   expenses。   You   couldn't   help   me;   could   youcouldn't
  give me something to keep my head straight?〃
  The need of my keeping his head straight that he might the easier rob
  our fellow…passengers raised a pretty question of ethics。 I meanly dodged
  it。   I   told   him   professional   etiquette   required   I   should   leave   him   to   the
  ship's surgeon。
  〃But I don't know HIM;〃 he protested。
  Mindful of the use he had made of my name; I objected strenuously:
  〃Well; you certainly don't know me。〃
  My res