第 11 节
作者:千顷寒      更新:2024-04-14 09:12      字数:9322
  I think men perish sometimes from sheer untalked talk。 For lack of a creative listener they gradually fill up with unexpressed emotion。 Presently this emotion begins to ferment; and finallybang!they blow up; burst; disappear in thin air。 In all that community I suppose there was no one but the little faded wife to whom the minister dared open his heart; and I think he found me a godsend。 All I really did was to look from one to the other and put in here and there an inciting comment or ask an understanding question。 After he had told me his situation and the difficulties which confronted him and his small church; he exclaimed suddenly:
  〃A minister should by rights be a leader; not only inside of his church; but outside it in the community。〃
  〃You are right;〃 I exclaimed with great earnestness; 〃you are right。〃
  And with that I told him of our own Scotch preacher and how he led and moulded our community; and as I talked I could see him actually growing; unfolding; under my eyes。
  〃Why;〃 said I; 〃you not only ought to be the moral leader of this community; but you are!〃
  〃That's what I tell him;〃 exclaimed his wife。
  〃But he persists in thinking; doesn't he; that he is a poor sinner?〃
  〃He thinks it too much;〃 she laughed。
  〃Yes; yes;〃 he said; as much to himself as to us; 〃a minister ought to be a fighter!〃
  It was beautiful; the boyish flush which now came into his face and the light that came into his eyes。 I should never have identified him with the Black Spectre of the afternoon。
  〃Why;〃 said I; 〃you ARE a fighter; you're fighting the greatest battle in the world todaythe only real battlethe battle for the spiritual view of life。〃
  Oh; I knew exactly what was the trouble with his religionat least the religion which; under the pressure of that church he felt obliged to preach! It was the old; groaning; denying; resisting religion。 It was the sort of religion which sets a man apart and assures him that the entire universe in the guise of the Powers of Darkness is leagued against him。 What he needed was a reviving draught of the new faith which affirms; accepts; rejoices; which feels the universe triumphantly behind it。 And so whenever the minister told me what he ought to befor he too sensed the new impulseI merely told him he was just that。 He needed only this little encouragement to unfold。
  〃Yes;〃 said he again; 〃I am the real moral leader here。〃
  At this I saw Mrs。 Minister nodding her head vigorously。
  〃It's you;〃 she said; 〃and not Mr。 Nash; who should lead this community。〃
  How a woman loves concrete applications。 She is your only true pragmatist。 If a philosophy will not work; says she; why bother with it?
  The minister rose quickly from his chair; threw back his head; and strode quickly up and down the room。
  〃You are right;〃 said he; 〃and I WILL lead it。 I'll have my farmers' meetings as I planned。〃
  It may have been the effect of the lamplight; but it seemed to me that little Mrs。 Minister; as she glanced up at him; looked actually pretty。
  The minister continued to stride up and down the room with his chin in the air。
  〃Mr。 Nash;〃 said she in a low voice to me; 〃is always trying to hold him down and keep him back。 My husband WANTS to do the great things〃wistfully。
  〃By every right;〃 the minister was repeating; quite oblivious of our presence; 〃I should lead these people。〃
  〃He sees the weakness of the church;〃 she continued; 〃as well as any one; and he wants to start some vigorous community workhave agricultural meetings and boys' clubs; and lots of things like thatbut Mr。 Nash says it is no part of a minister's work: that it cheapens religion。 He says that when a parsonMr。 Nash always calls him parson; and I just LOATHE that name has preached; and prayed; and visited the sick; that's enough for HIM。〃
  At this very moment a step sounded upon the walk; and an instant later a figure appeared in the doorway。
  〃Why; Mr。 Nash;〃 exclaimed little Mrs。 Minister; exhibiting that astonishing gift of swift recovery which is the possession of even the simplest women; 〃come right in。〃
  It was some seconds before the minister could come down from the heights and greet Mr。 Nash。 As for me; I was never more interested in my life。
  〃Now;〃 said I to myself; 〃we shall see Christian meet Apollyon。〃
  As soon as Mrs。 Minister lighted the lamp I was introduced to the great man。 He looked at me sharply with his small; round eyes; and said:
  〃Oh; you are thethe man who was in church this afternoon。〃
  I admitted it; and he looked around at the minister with an accusing expression。 He evidently did not approve of me; nor could I wholly blame him; for I knew well how he; as a rich farmer; must look upon a rusty man of the road like me。 I should have liked dearly to cross swords with him myself; but greater events were imminent。
  In no time at all the discussion; which had evidently been broken off at some previous meeting; concerning the proposed farmers' assembly at the church; had taken on a really lively tone。 Mr。 Nash was evidently in the somewhat irritable mood with which important people may sometimes indulge themselves; for he bit off his words in a way that was calculated to make any but an unusually meek and saintly man exceedingly uncomfortable。 But the minister; with the fine; high humility of those whose passion is for great or true things; was quite oblivious to the harsh words。 Borne along by an irresistible enthusiasm; he told in glowing terms what his plan would mean to the community; how the people needed a new social and civic spirita 〃neighbourhood religious feeling〃 he called it。 And as he talked his face flushed; and his eyes shone with the pure fire of a great purpose。 But I could see that all this enthusiasm impressed the practical Mr。 Nash as mere moonshine。 He grew more and more uneasy。 Finally he brought his hand down with a resounding thwack upon his knee; and said in a high; cutting voice:
  〃I don't believe in any such newfangled nonsense。 It ain't none of a parson's business what the community does。 You're hired; ain't you; an' paid to run the church? That's the end of it。 We ain't goin' to have any mixin' of religion an' farmin' in THIS neighbourhood。〃
  My eyes were on the pale man of God。 I felt as though a human soul were being weighed in the balance。 What would he do now? What was he worth REALLY as a man as well as a minister?
  He paused a moment with downcast eyes。 I saw little Mrs。 Minister glance at himoncewistfully。 He rose from his place; drew himself up to his full heightI shall not soon forget the look on his faceand uttered these amazing words:
  〃Martha; bring the ginger…jar。〃
  Mrs。 Minister; without a word; went to a little cupboard on the farther side of the room and took down a brown earthenware jar; which she brought over and placed on the table; Mr。 Nash following her movements with astonished eyes。 No one spoke。
  The minister took the jar in his hands as he might the communion…cup just before saying the prayer of the sacrament。
  〃Mr。 Nash;〃 said he in a loud voice; 〃I've decided to hold that farmers' meeting。〃
  Before Mr。 Nash could reply the minister seated himself and was pouring out the contents of the jar upon the tablea clatter of dimes; nickels; pennies; a few quarters and half dollars; and a very few bills。
  〃Martha; just how much money is there?〃
  〃Twenty…four dollars and sixteen cents。〃
  The minister put his hand into his pocket and; after counting out certain coins; said:
  〃Here's one dollar and eighty…four cents more。 That makes twenty…six dollars。 Now; Mr。 Nash; you're the largest contributor to my salary in this neighbourhood。 You gave twenty…six dollars last yearfifty cents a week。 It is a generous contribution; but I cannot take it any longer。 It is fortunate that my wife has saved up this money to buy a sewing…machine; so that we can pay back your contribution in full。〃
  He paused; no one of us spoke a word。
  〃Mr。 Nash;〃 he continued; and his face was good to see; 〃I am the minister here。 I am convinced that what the community needs is more of a religious and social spirit; and I am going about getting it in the way the Lord leads me。〃
  At this I saw Mrs。 Minister look up at her husband with such a light in her eyes as any man might well barter his life forI could not keep my own eyes from pure beauty of it。
  I knew too what this defiance meant。 It meant that this little family was placing its all upon the altareven the pitiful coins for which they had skimped and saved for months for a particular purpose。 Talk of the heroism of the men who charged with Pickett at Gettysburg! Here was a courage higher and whiter than that; here was a courage that dared to fight alone。
  As for Mr。 Nash; the face of that Chief Pharisee was a study。 Nothing is so paralyzing to a rich man as to find suddenly that his money will no longer command him any advantage。 Like all hard…shelled; practical people; Mr。 Nash could only dominate in a world which recognized the same material supremacy that he recognized。 Any one who insisted upon flying was lost to Mr。 Nash。
  The minister pushed the little pile of coins toward him。
  〃Take it; Mr。 Nash;〃 said he。
  At that Mr。 Nash rose hastily。
  〃I will not;〃 he said gruff