第 147 节
作者:温暖寒冬      更新:2024-04-09 19:50      字数:9163
  the great change that had come since the day when she had looked
  up   at   the   tall   man   in   the   cottage。   There   was   a   trembling   in   her
  clear voice as she put her hand into his and said; “Be comforted;
  Adam Bede; the Lord has not forsaken her。”
  George Eliot                                                    ElecBook Classics
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  Adam Bede                                     600
  “Bless you for coming to her;” Adam said。 “Mr。 Massey brought
  me word yesterday as you was come。”
  They   could   neither   of   them   say   any   more   just   yet;   but   stood
  before each other in silence; and Bartle Massey; too; who had put
  on his spectacles; seemed transfixed; examining Dinah’s face。 But
  he recovered himself first; and said; “Sit down; young woman; sit
  down;” placing the chair for her and retiring to his old seat on the
  bed。
  “Thank you; friend; I won’t sit down;”   said   Dinah;   “for  I must
  hasten back。 She entreated me not to stay long away。 What I came
  for; Adam Bede; was to pray you to go and see the poor sinner and
  bid her farewell。 She desires to ask your forgiveness; and it is meet
  you should see her to…day; rather than in the early morning; when
  the time will be short。”
  Adam      stood    trembling;    and    at  last  sank   down    on   his  chair
  again。
  “It won’t be;” he said; “it’ll be put off—there’ll perhaps come a
  pardon。 Mr。 Irwine said there   was   hope。   He said;   I needn’t  quite
  give it up。”
  “That’s   a   blessed   thought   to   me;”   said   Dinah;   her   eyes   filling
  with tears。 “It’s a fearful thing hurrying her soul away so fast。”
  “But   let   what   will   be;”   she   added   presently。   “You   will   surely
  come; and let her speak the words that are in her heart。 Although
  her poor soul is very dark and discerns little beyond the things of
  the flesh; she is no longer hard。 She is contrite; she has confessed
  all to me。 The pride of her heart has given way; and she leans on
  me for help and desires to be taught。 This fills me with trust; for I
  cannot   but   think   that   the   brethren   sometimes   err   in   measuring
  the Divine love by the sinner’s knowledge。 She is going to write a
  George Eliot                                                        ElecBook Classics
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  Adam Bede                                       601
  letter to the friends at the Hall Farm for me to give them when she
  is gone; and when I told her you were here; she said; ‘I should like
  to   say   good…bye   to   Adam   and   ask   him   to   forgive   me。’   You   will
  come; Adam? Perhaps you will even now come back with me。”
  “I   can’t;”   Adam   said。   “I   can’t   say   good…bye   while   there’s   any
  hope。 I’m listening; and listening—I can’t think o’ nothing but that。
  It can’t be as she’ll die that shameful death—I can’t bring my mind
  to it。”
  He   got   up   from   his   chair   again   and   looked   away   out   of     the
  window;       while   Dinah     stood   with    compassionate        patience。    In  a
  minute or two he turned round and said;
  “I will come; Dinah 。 。 。 to…morrow morning 。 。 。 if it must be。 I
  may have more strength to bear it; if I know it must be。 Tell her; I
  forgive her; tell her I will come—at the very last。”
  “I will not urge you against the voice of your own heart;”   said
  Dinah。   “I   must   hasten   back   to   her;   for   it   is   wonderful   how   she
  clings now; and was not willing to let me out of her sight。 She used
  never     to   make     any    return    to   my    affection    before;    but   now
  tribulation   has   opened   her   heart。   Farewell;   Adam。   Our   heavenly
  Father comfort you and strengthen you to bear all things。” Dinah
  put out her hand; and Adam pressed it in silence。
  Bartle Massey was getting up to lift the stiff latch of the door for
  her; but before he could reach  it; she  had  said   gently;   “Farewell;
  friend;” and was gone; with her light step down the stairs。
  “Well;” said   Bartle;  taking  off  his spectacles   and putting  them
  into  his   pocket;   “if  there   must  be   women   to   make   trouble   in   the
  world; it’s but fair there should be women to be comforters under
  it;  and    she’s   one—she’s      one。   It’s  a  pity  she’s   a  Methodist;      but
  there’s no getting a woman without some foolishness or other。”
  George Eliot                                                          ElecBook Classics
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  Adam Bede                                      602
  Adam      never     went    to  bed    that   night。    The    excitement      of
  suspense;   heightening   with   every   hour   that   brought   him   nearer
  the fatal moment; was too great; and in spite of his   entreaties;  in
  spite    of  his   promises      that   he   would    be   perfectly     quiet;   the
  schoolmaster watched too。
  “What does it matter to me; lad?” Bartle said: “a night’s   sleep
  more or less? I shall sleep long enough; by and by; underground。
  Let me keep thee company in trouble while I can。”
  It   was   a   long   and   dreary   night   in   that   small   chamber。   Adam
  would sometimes get up and tread backwards and forwards along
  the short space from wall to wall; then he would sit down and hide
  his face; and no sound would be heard but the ticking of the watch
  on   the   table;   or   the   falling   of   a   cinder   from   the   fire   which   the
  schoolmaster carefully tended。 Sometimes he would burst out into
  vehement speech; “If I could ha’ done anything to save her—if my
  bearing  anything  would   ha’   done   any  good   。   。   。   but   t’   have   to   sit
  still; and know it; and do nothing 。 。 。 it’s hard for a man to bear 。 。 。
  and to think o’ what might ha’ been now; if it hadn’t been for him 。
  。 。 O God; it’s the very day we should ha’ been married。”
  “Aye; my lad;” said Bartle tenderly; “it’s heavy—it’s heavy。 But
  you must remember this: when you thought of marrying her; you’d
  a notion she’d got another sort of a nature inside her。 You didn’t
  think she could have got hardened in that little while to  do  what
  she’s done。”
  “I   know—I know  that;”   said   Adam。   “I   thought   she   was   loving
  and  tender…hearted; and   wouldn’t  tell   a lie;   or act  deceitful。   How
  could I think any other way? And if he’d never come near her; and
  I’d married her; and been loving to her; and took care of her; she
  might never ha’ done anything bad。 What would it ha’ signified—
  George Eliot                                                         ElecBook Classics
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  Adam Bede                                      603
  my   having   a   bit   o’   trouble   with   her?   It   ’ud   ha’   been   nothing   to
  this。”
  “There’s no knowing; my lad—there’s no knowing  what  might
  have come。 The smart’s bad for  you  to  bear  now:   you  must  have
  time—you must have time。 But I’ve that opinion of you; that you’ll
  rise above it all and be a man again; and there may good come out
  of this that we don’t see。”
  “Good   come  out  of  it!”   said   Adam   passionately。   “That   doesn’t
  alter th’ evil: her ruin can’t be undone。 I hate that talk o’ people; as
  if there was a way o’ making amends for everything。 They’d more
  need be brought to see as the wrong they do can never be altered。
  When   a   man’s   spoiled       his  fellow…creatur’s     life;  he’s   no   right   to
  comfort himself with thinking good may come out of it。 Somebody
  else’s good doesn’t alter her shame and misery。”
  “Well;    lad;  well;”   said   Bartle;   in  a  gentle    tone;   strangely    in
  contrast      with    his   usual     peremptoriness        and     impatience       of
  contradiction;       “it’s  likely  enough     I  talk  foolishness。    I’m   an   old
  fellow;   and it’s a   good   many  years   since   I   was   in   trouble   myself。
  It’s easy finding reasons why other folks should be patient。”
  “Mr。 Massey;” said Adam penitently; “I’m very hot and hasty。 I
  owe you something different; but you mustn’t take it ill of me。”
  “Not I; lad—not I。”
  So   the   night   wore   on   in   agitation   till   the   chill   dawn   and   the
  growing light brought the tremulous quiet that comes on the brink
  of despair。 There would soon be no more suspense。
  “Let us go to the prison now; Mr。 Massey;” said Adam; when he
  saw  the   hand   of   his   watch  at   six。   “If   there’s   any   news   come;   we
  shall hear about it。?