第 176 节
作者:这就是结局      更新:2022-08-21 16:40      字数:9321
  which was most upon their minds; since she had never before witnessed
  one of the seizures; that were only too ordinary matters in the eyes
  of the home party。  No one but Dr。 May and Ethel should go。  Richard
  undertook to tell the rest; and the gig making its appearance; Ethel
  felt that the peculiarly kind manner with which the bishop pressed
  her hand; and gave them all good wishes; was like a continuation of
  his blessing to aid her in her home scene of trial。
  Perhaps; it was well for her that her part in the consecration
  festivities should end here; at least so thought Mr。 Wilmot; who;
  though very sorry for the cause; could not wish her to have been
  present at the luncheon。  She had not thought of self hitherto; the
  church was the gift of Alan and Margaret; the work of preparing the
  people belonged to all alike; and she did not guess that; in the
  sight of others; she was not the nobody that she believed herself。
  Her share in the work at Cocksmoor was pretty well known; and Dr。
  Hoxton could not allow a public occasion to pass without speeches;
  such as must either have been very painful; or very hurtful to her。
  The absence of herself and her father; however; permitted a more free
  utterance to the general feeling; and things were said; that did
  indeed make the rest of the family extremely hot and uncomfortable;
  but which gave them extreme pleasure。  Norman was obliged to spare
  Richard the answer; and said exactly what he ought; and so
  beautifully; that Meta could not find it in her heart to echo the
  fervent wish; which he whispered as he sat down; that speechifying
  could be abolished by Act of Parliament。
  Mrs。 Arnott began to perceive that her nephew was something to be
  proud of; and to understand how much was sacrificed; while George
  Rivers expressed his opinion to her that Norman would be a crack
  speaker in the House; and he hoped she would say everything to hinder
  his going out; for it was a regular shame to waste him on the
  niggers。
  Owing to George having constituted himself her squire; Mrs。 Arnott
  had not arrived at an understanding of the state of affairs at home;
  but; as soon as they rose up from luncheon; and she learned the truth
  from Richard and Mary; nothing would hinder her from walking home at
  once to see whether she could be useful。  Mary was easily persuaded
  to remain; for she was accustomed to Margaret's having these attacks;
  and had always been kept out of her room the while; so she had little
  uneasiness to prevent her from being very happy; in receiving in her
  own simple; good…humoured way all the attentions that lapsed upon her
  in the place of her elder sisters。
  〃Cocksmoor really has a church!〃 was note enough of joy for her; and
  no one could look at her round face without seeing perfect happiness。
  Moreover; when after evening service; the November mist turned into
  decided rain; she was as happy as a queen in her foresight; which had
  provided what seemed an unlimited supply of cloaks and umbrellas。
  She appeared to have an original genius for making the right people
  give a lift in their carriages to the distressed; and; regarding the
  Abbotstoke britska as her own; packed in Mrs。 Anderson and Fanny; in
  addition to all their own little ones; Meta thrusting Miss Bracy into
  the demi…corner destined for herself at the last minute; and;
  remaining with Mary; the only ladies obliged to walk back to
  Stoneborough。  So delighted were they 〃at the fun;〃 that it might
  have been thought the most charming of adventures; and they laughed
  all the more at the lack of umbrellas。  They went to Mrs。 Elwood's;
  divested themselves of all possible finery; and tucked up the rest;
  Meta was rolled up from head to foot in a great old plaid shawl of
  Mrs。 Elwood's; and Mary had a cloak of Richard's; the one took
  Norman's arm; the other Dr。 Spencer's; and they trudged home through
  the darkness and the mud in the highest glee; quite sorry when the
  carriage met them half…way。
  It was the last mirth that they enjoyed for many weeks。  When they
  reached home; a sense of self…reproach for their glee thrilled over
  them; when they found a sort of hush pervading the drawing…room; and
  saw the faces of awe and consternation; worn by Blanche and George
  Rivers。
  〃It was a much worse attack than usual; and it did not go off;〃 was
  all that Blanche knew; but her father had desired to be told when Dr。
  Spencer came home; and she went up with the tidings。
  This brought Flora down; looking dreadfully pale; and with her voice
  sunk away as it had been when she lost her child。  Her husband
  started up; exclaiming at her aspect; she let him support her to the
  sofa; and gave the few particulars。  Margaret had been as placid and
  comfortable as usual; till nurse came to dress her; but the first
  move had brought on the faintness and loss of breath。  It did not
  yield to remedies; and she had neither looked nor spoken since; only
  moaned。  Flora thought her father much alarmed; and then; after an
  interval; she began to entreat that they might stay there; sending
  Miss Bracy and the children to the Grange to make room。
  Meantime; Dr。 Spencer had come to the sick…room; but he could only
  suggest remedies that were already in course of application to the
  insensible sufferer。  Mrs。 Arnott and Ethel were watching; and trying
  everything to relieve her; but with little effect; and Ethel
  presently stood by the fire with her father; as Dr。 Spencer turned
  towards him; and he said; in a very low; but calm voice; 〃It won't
  doI believe it is the death…stroke。〃
  〃Not immediate;〃 said Dr。 Spencer。
  〃No;〃 said Dr。 May; and he quietly spoke of what the disease had
  effected; and what yet remained for it to do; ere the silver bowl
  should be broken。
  Dr。 Spencer put in a word of agreement。
  〃Will there be no rally?〃 said Ethel; in the same tone。
  〃Probably not;〃 said Dr。 May; 〃the brain is generally reached at this
  stage。  I have seen it coming for a long time。  The thing was done
  seven years ago。  There was a rally for a time when youth was strong;
  but suspense and sorrow accelerated what began from the injury to the
  spine。〃
  Dr。 Spencer bowed his head; and looked at him anxiously; saying; 〃I
  do not think there will be much acute suffering。〃
  〃I fear it may be as trying;〃 said Dr。 May; sighing; and then turning
  to Ethel; and throwing his arm round her; 〃May God make it easy to
  her; and grant us 'patient hearts。'  We will not grudge her to all
  that she loves best; my Ethel。〃
  Ethel clung to him; as if to derive strength from him。  But the
  strength that was in them then did not come from earth。  Dr。 Spencer
  wrung his hand; and stepped back to the bed to try another resource。
  Vain again; they only seemed to be tormenting her; and the silent
  helplessness prevailed again。  Then Dr。 May went down to Flora; told
  her the true state of the case; and urged on her to give up her plan
  of remaining。  George joined with him; and she yielded submissively;
  but would not be refused going up once again and kissing her sister;
  standing beside her gazing at her; till her father came softly and
  drew her away。  〃I shall be here to…morrow;〃 she said to Ethel; and
  went。
  The morrow; however; brought no Flora。  The agitation and distress of
  that day had broken her down completely; and she was so ill as to be
  unable to move。  Her aunt went at once to see her; and finding that
  her presence at the Grange relieved some of Dr。 May's anxieties;
  chiefly devoted herself to her。  Flora was grateful and gentle; but
  as silent and impenetrable as ever; while day after day she lay on
  her couch; uncomplaining and undemonstrative; visited by her father;
  and watched over by her aunt and sister…in…law; who began to know
  each other much better; though Flora less than ever; in that deep
  fixed grief。  She only roused herself to return her husband's
  affection; or to listen to the daily reports of Margaret。  Poor
  George; he was very forlorn; though Meta did her best to wait on him;
  and he rode over twice a day to inquire at Stoneborough。
  The doctors were right; and the consecration morning was her last of
  full consciousness。  From the hour when she had heard the sound of
  Alan's bells; her ears were closed to earthly sounds。  There was very
  little power of intercourse with her; as she lingered on the borders
  of the land very far away; where skill and tenderness could not
  either reach body or spirit。  Often the watchers could not tell
  whether she was conscious; or only incapacitated from expression; by
  the fearful weight on her breath; which caused a restlessness most
  piteous in the exhausted helpless frame; wasted till the softest
  touch was anguish。  Now and then came precious gleams when a familiar
  voice; or some momentary alleviation would gain a smile; or thanks;
  and they thought her less restless when Richard read prayers beside
  her; but words were very rare; only now and then a name; and when in
  most distress; 〃it will be soon over;〃 〃it will soon be over;〃
  occurred so often; that they began to think it once her solace; and
  now repeated habitually without a meaning。
  They could not follow her into the valley of the shadow of death; but
  could only watch the frail earthly prison…house