第 138 节
作者:这就是结局      更新:2022-08-21 16:40      字数:9322
  〃but after all; Mary dear; he did not pout out his chin in that way。〃
  Mary was somewhat mortified; but she valued her photograph more than
  ever; because no one else would admire it; except Daisy; whom she had
  taught to regard it with unrivalled veneration。
  A letter soon arrived from Captain Gordon; giving a fuller account of
  the loss of his ship; and of the conduct of his officers; speaking in
  the highest terms of Alan Ernescliffe; for whom he said he mourned as
  for his own son; and; with scarcely less warmth; of Harry; mentioning
  the high esteem all had felt for the boy; and the good effect which
  the influence of his high and truthful spirit had produced on the
  other youngsters; who keenly regretted him。
  Captain Gordon added that the will of the late Captain Ernescliffe
  had made him guardian of his sons; and that he believed poor Alan had
  died intestate。  He should therefore take upon himself the charge of
  young Hector; and he warmly thanked Dr。 May and his family for all
  the kindness that the lad had received。
  Though the loss of poor Hector's visits was regretted; it was; on the
  whole; a comforting letter; and would give still more comfort in
  future time。
  Richard contrived to come home through Oxford and see Norman; whom he
  found calm; and almost relieved by the cessation from suspense; not
  inclined; as his father had feared; to drown sorrow in labour; but
  regarding his grief as an additional call to devote himself to
  ministerial work。  In fact; the blow had fallen when he first heard
  the rumour of danger; and could not recur with the same force。
  Richard was surprised to find that Margaret was less cast down than
  he could have dared to hope。  It did not seem like an affliction to
  her。  Her countenance wore the same gentle smile; and she was as
  ready to participate in all that passed; finding sympathy for the
  little pleasures of Aubrey and Gertrude; and delighting in Flora's
  baby; as well as going over Cocksmoor politics with a clearness and
  accuracy that astonished him; and asking questions about his parish
  and occupations; so as fully to enjoy his short visit; which she
  truly called the greatest possible treat。
  If it had not been for the momentary consternation that she had seen
  upon Dr。 Spencer's face; Ethel would have been perfectly satisfied;
  but she could not help sometimes entertaining a dim fancy that this
  composure came from a sense that she was too near Alan to mourn for
  him。  Could it be true that her frame was more wasted; that there was
  less capability of exertion; that her hours became later in the
  morning; and that her nights were more wakeful?  Would she fade away?
  Ethel longed to know what her father thought; but she could neither
  bear to inspire him with the apprehension; nor to ask Dr。 Spencer's
  opinion; lest she should be confirmed in her own。
  The present affliction altered Dr。 May more visibly than the death of
  his wife; perhaps; because there was not the same need of exertion。
  If he often rose high in faith and resignation; he would also sink
  very low under the sense of bereavement and disappointment。  Though
  Richard was his stay; and Norman his pride; there was something in
  Harry more congenial to his own temper; and he could not but be bowed
  down by the ruin of such bright hopes。  With all his real submission;
  he was weak; and gave way to outbursts of grief; for which he blamed
  himself as unthankful; and his whole demeanour was so saddened and
  depressed; that Ethel and Dr。 Spencer consulted mournfully over him;
  whenever they walked to Cocksmoor together。
  This was not as often as usual; though the walls of the school were
  rising; for Dr。 Spencer had taken a large share of his friend's work
  for the present; and both physicians were much occupied by the
  condition of Mr。 Ramsden who was fast sinking; and; for some weeks;
  seemed only kept alive by their skill。  The struggle ended at last;
  and his forty years' cure of Stoneborough was closed。  It made Dr。
  May very sadhis affections had tendrils for anything that he had
  known from boyhood; and though he had often spoken strong words of
  the vicar; he now sat sorrowfully moralising and making excuses。
  〃People in former times had not so high an estimate of pastoral duty…
  …poor Mr。 Ramsden had not much educationhe was already old when
  better times came inhe might have done better in a less difficult
  parish with better laity to support him; etc。〃  Yet after all; he
  exclaimed with one of his impatient gestures; 〃Better have my Harry's
  seventeen years than his sixty…seven!〃
  〃Better improve a talent than lay it by!〃 said Ethel。
  〃Hush! Ethel。  How do you know what he may have done?  If he acted up
  to his own standard; he did more than most of us。〃
  〃Which is best;〃 said Ethel; 〃a high standard; not acted up to; or a
  lower one fulfilled?〃
  〃I think it depends on the will;〃 said Margaret。
  〃Some people are angry with those whose example would show that there
  is a higher standard;〃 said Ethel。
  〃And;〃 said Margaret; 〃some who have the high one set before them
  content themselves with knowing that it cannot be fully attained; and
  will not try。〃
  〃The standard is the effect of early impression;〃 said Dr。 May。  〃I
  should be very sorry to think it could not be raised。〃
  〃Faithful in a little〃 said Ethel。  〃I suppose all good people's
  standard is always going higher。〃
  〃As they comprehend more of absolute perfection;〃 said Margaret。
  CHAPTER XV。
  The city's golden spire it was;
  When hope and health were strongest;
  But now it is the churchyard grass;
  We look upon the longest。E。 B。 BROWNING。
  A disinclination for exertion or going into public hung upon Dr。 May;
  but he was obliged to rouse himself to attend the Town Council
  meeting; which was held a few days after the vicar's funeral; to
  decide on the next appointment。  If it had depended on himself alone;
  his choice would have been Mr。 Edward Wilmot; whom the death of his
  good old father had uprooted from Settlesham; and the girls had much
  hope; but he was too much out of spirits to be sanguine。  He said
  that he should only hear a great deal of offensive stuff from Tomkins
  the brewer; and that; in the desire to displease nobody; the votes
  should settle down on some nonentity; was the best which was likely
  to happen。  Thus; grumbling; he set off; and his daughters watched
  anxiously for his return。  They saw him come through the garden with
  a quick; light step; that made them augur well; and he entered the
  room with the corners of his mouth turning up。  〃I see;〃 said Ethel;
  〃it is all right。〃
  〃They were going to have made a very absurd choice。〃
  〃But you prevented it?  Who was it?〃
  〃Ah!  I told you Master Ritchie was turning out a popular preacher。〃
  〃You don't mean that they chose Richard!〃 cried Margaret
  breathlessly。
  〃As sure as my name is Dick May; they did; every man of them; except
  Tomkins; and even he held his tongue; I did not think it of them;〃
  said the doctor; almost overcome; 〃but there is much more goodness of
  heart in the world than one gives it credit for。〃
  And good Dr。 May was not one to give the least credit for all that
  was like himself。
  〃But it was Richard's own doing;〃 he continued。  〃Those sermons made
  a great impression; and they love the boy; because he has grown up
  among them。  The old mayor waddled up to me; as I came in; telling me
  that they had been talking it over; and they were unanimously agreed
  that they could not have a parson they should like better than Mr。
  Richard。〃
  〃Good old Mr。 Doddesley!  I can see him!〃 cried Ethel。
  〃I expected it so little; that I thought he meant some Richards; but
  no; he said Mr。 Richard May; if he had nothing better in viewthey
  liked him; and knew he was a very steady; good young gentleman; and
  if he took after his fathers that went before himand they thought
  we might like to have him settled near!〃
  〃How very kind!〃 said Margaret; as the tears came。  〃We shall love
  our own townsfolk better than ever!〃
  〃I always told you so; if you would but believe it。  They have warm;
  sound hearts; every one of them!  I declare; I did not know which way
  to look; I was so sorry to disappoint them。〃
  〃Disappoint them!〃 cried Margaret; in consternation。
  〃I was thinking;〃 said Ethel。  〃I do not believe Richard would think
  himself equal to this place in such a state as it is。  He is so
  diffident。〃
  〃Yes;〃 said Dr。 May; 〃if he were ten or twelve years older; it would
  be another thing; but here; where everything is to be done; he would
  not bring weight or force enough。  He would only work himself to
  death; for individuals; without going to the root。  Margaret; my
  darling; I am very sorry to have disappointed you so muchit would
  have been as great a pleasure as we could have had in this world to
  have the lad here〃
  〃And Cocksmoor;〃 sighed Ethel。
  〃I shall be grateful all my life to those good people for thinking of
  it;〃 continued the doctor; 〃but look you here; it was my business to
  get the best man chosen in my power and; though as to goodness; I
  believe the dear Ritchie has not many equals; I don't think we can
  conscientiously say he would be; at present; the best vicar for
  Stoneboroug