natured　forbearance。　　Of　all　qualities；　good　temper　is　the　one
  that　wears　and　works　the　best　in　married　life。　　Conjoined　with
  self…control；　it　gives　patiencethe　patience　to　bear　and
  forbear；　to　listen　without　retort；　to　refrain　until　the　angry
  flash　has　passed。　　How　true　it　is　in　marriage；　that　〃the　soft
  answer　turneth　away　wrath！〃
  Burns　the　poet；　in　speaking　of　the　qualities　of　a　good　wife；
  divided　them　into　ten　parts。　　Four　of　these　he　gave　to　good
  temper；　two　to　good　sense；　one　to　wit；　one　to　beautysuch　as　a
  sweet　face；　eloquent　eyes；　a　fine　person；　a　graceful　carriage；　and
  the　other　two　parts　he　divided　amongst　the　other　qualities
  belonging　to　or　attending　on　a　wifesuch　as　fortune；
  connections；　education　（that　is；　of　a　higher　standard　than
  ordinary）；　family　blood；　&c。；　but　he　said：　〃Divide　those　two
  degrees　as　you　please；　only　remember　that　all　these　minor
  proportions　must　be　expressed　by　fractions；　for　there　is　not　any
  one　of　them　that　is　entitled　to　the　dignity　of　an　integer。〃
  It　has　been　said　that　girls　are　very　good　at　making　nets；　but
  that　it　would　be　better　still　if　they　would　learn　to　make　cages。
  Men　are　often　as　easily　caught　as　birds；　but　as　difficult　to　keep。
  If　the　wife　cannot　make　her　home　bright　and　happy；　so　that　it
  shall　be　the　cleanest；　sweetest；　cheerfulest　place　that　her
  husband　can　find　refuge　ina　retreat　from　the　toils　and
  troubles　of　the　outer　worldthen　God　help　the　poor　man；
  for　he　is　virtually　homeless！
  No　wise　person　will　marry　for　beauty　mainly。　　It　may　exercise　a
  powerful　attraction　in　the　first　place；　but　it　is　found　to　be　of
  comparatively　little　consequence　afterwards。　　Not　that　beauty　of
  person　is　to　be　underestimated；　for；　other　things　being　equal；
  handsomeness　of　form　and　beauty　of　features　are　the　outward
  manifestations　of　health。　　But　to　marry　a　handsome　figure　without
  character；　fine　features　unbeautified　by　sentiment　or　good…nature；
  is　the　most　deplorable　of　mistakes。　　As　even　the　finest　landscape；
  seen　daily；　becomes　monotonous；　so　does　the　most　beautiful　face；
  unless　a　beautiful　nature　shines　through　it。　　The　beauty　of　to…day
  becomes　commonplace　to…morrow；　whereas　goodness；　displayed　through
  the　most　ordinary　features；　is　perennially　lovely。　　Moreover；　this
  kind　of　beauty　improves　with　age；　and　time　ripens　rather　than
  destroys　it。　　After　the　first　year；　married　people　rarely　think　of
  each　other's　features；　and　whether　they　be　classically　beautiful
  or　otherwise。　　But　they　never　fail　to　be　cognisant　of　each　other's
  temper。　　〃When　I　see　a　man；〃　says　Addison；　〃with　a　sour　rivelled
  face；　I　cannot　forbear　pitying　his　wife；　and　when　I　meet　with　an
  open　ingenuous　countenance；　I　think　of　the　happiness　of　his
  friends；　his　family；　and　his　relations。〃
  We　have　given　the　views　of　the　poet　Burns　as　to　the　qualities
  necessary　in　a　good　wife。　　Let　us　add　the　advice　given　by　Lord
  Burleigh　to　his　son；　embodying　the　experience　of　a　wise　statesman
  and　practised　man　of　the　world。　　〃When　it　shall　please　God；〃　said
  he；　〃to　bring　thee　to　man's　estate；　use　great　providence　and
  circumspection　in　choosing　thy　wife；　for　from　thence　will　spring
  all　thy　future　good　or　evil。　　And　it　is　an　action　of　thy　life；
  like　unto　a　stratagem　of　war；　wherein　a　man　can　err　but　once。。。。
  Enquire　diligently　of　her　disposition；　and　how　her　parents　have
  been　inclined　in　their　youth。　（9）　　Let　her　not　be　poor；　how
  generous　（well…born）　soever；　for　a　man　can　buy　nothing　in　the
  market　with　gentility。　　Nor　choose　a　base　and　uncomely　creature
  altogether　for　wealth；　for　it　will　cause　contempt　in　others；　and
  loathing　in　thee。　　Neither　make　choice　of　a　dwarf；　or　a　fool；　for
  by　the　one　thou　shalt　beget　a　race　of　pigmies；　while　the　other
  will　be　thy　continual　disgrace；　and　it　will　yirke　（irk）　thee　to
  hear　her　talk。　　For　thou　shalt　find　it　to　thy　great　grief；　that
  there　is　nothing　more　fulsome　（disgusting）　than　a　she…fool。〃
  A　man's　moral　character　is；　necessarily；　powerfully　influenced　by
  his　wife。　　A　lower　nature　will　drag　him　down；　as　a　higher　will
  lift　him　up。　　The　former　will　deaden　his　sympathies；　dissipate　his
  energies；　and　distort　his　life；　while　the　latter；　by　satisfying
  his　affections；　will　strengthen　his　moral　nature；　and　by　giving
  him　repose；　tend　to　energise　his　intellect。　　Not　only　so；　but　a
  woman　of　high　principles　will　insensibly　elevate　the　aims　and
  purposes　of　her　husband；　as　one　of　low　principles　will
  unconsciously　degrade　them。　　De　Tocqueville　was　profoundly
  impressed　by　this　truth。　　He　entertained　the　opinion　that　man
  could　have　no　such　mainstay　in　life　as　the　companionship　of　a　wife
  of　good　temper　and　high　principle。　　He　says　that　in　the　course　of
  his　life；　he　had　seen　even　weak　men　display　real　public　virtue；
  because　they　had　by　their　side　a　woman　of　noble　character；　who
  sustained　them　in　their　career；　and　exercised　a　fortifying
  influence　on　their　views　of　public　duty；　whilst；　on　the　contrary；
  he　had　still　oftener　seen　men　of　great　and　generous　instincts
  transformed　into　vulgar　self…seekers；　by　contact　with　women　of
  narrow　natures；　devoted　to　an　imbecile　love　of　pleasure；　and　from
  whose　minds　the　grand　motive　of　Duty　was　altogether　absent。
  De　Tocqueville　himself　had　the　good　fortune　to　be　blessed　with　an
  admirable　wife：　（10）　and　in　his　letters　to　his　intimate　friends；　he
  spoke　most　gratefully　of　the　comfort　and　support　he　derived　from
  her　sustaining　courage；　her　equanimity　of　temper；　and　her　nobility
  of　character。　　The　more；　indeed；　that　De　Tocqueville　saw　of　the
  world　and　of　practical　life；　the　more　convinced　he　became　of　the
  necessity　of　healthy　domestic　conditions　for　a　man's　growth　in
  virtue　and　goodness。　（11）　　Especially　did　he　regard　marriage　as　of
  inestimable　importance　in　regard　to　a　man's　true　happiness；　and　he
  was　accustomed　to　speak　of　his　own　as　the　wisest　action　of　his
  life。　　〃Many　external　circumstances　of　happiness；〃　he　said；　〃have
  been　granted　to　me。　　But　more　than　all；　I　have　to　thank　Heaven　for
  having　bestowed　on　me　true　domestic　happiness；　the　first　of　human
  blessings。　　As　I　grow　older；　the　portion　of　my　life　which　in　my
  youth　I　used　to　look　down　upon；　every　day　becomes　more　important
  in　my　eyes；　and　would　now　easily　console　me　for　the　loss　of　all
  the　rest。〃　　And　again；　writing　to　his　bosom…friend；　De　Kergorlay；
  he　said：　〃Of　all　the　blessings　which　God　has　given　to　me；　the
  greatest　of　all　in　my　eyes　is　to　have　lighted　on　Marie。　　You
  cannot　imagine　what　she　is　in　great　trials。　　Usually　so　gentle；
  she　then　becomes　strong　and　energetic。　　She　watches　me　without　my
  knowing　it；　she　softens；　calms；　and　strengthens　me　in　difficulties
  which　disturb　ME；　but　leave　her　serene。〃　（12）　In　another　letter　he
  says：　〃I　cannot　describe　to　you　the　happiness　yielded　in　the　long
  run　by　the　habitual　society　of　a　woman　in　whose　soul　all　that　is
  good　in　your　own　is　reflected　naturally；　and　even　improved。　　When
  I　say　or　do　a　thing　which　seems　to　me　to　be　perfectly　right；　I
  read　immediately　in　Marie's　countenance　an　expression　of　proud
  satisfaction　which　elevates　me。　　And　so；　when　my　conscience
  reproaches　me；　her　face　instantly　clouds　over。　　Although　I　have
  great　power　over　her　mind；　I　see　with　pleasure　that　she　awes　me；
  and　so　long　as　I　love　her　as　I　do　now；　I　am　sure　that　I　shall
  never　allow　myself　to　be　drawn　into　anything　that　is　wrong。〃
  In　the　retired　life　which　De　Tocqueville　led　as　a　literary　man
  political　life　being　closed　against　him　by　the　inflexible
  independence　of　his　characterhis　health　failed；　and　he　became
  ill；　irritable；　and　querulous。　　While　proceeding　with　his　last
  work；　'L'Ancien　Regime　et　la　Revolution；'　he　wrote：　〃After　sitting
  at　my　desk　for　five　or　six　hours；　I　can　write　no　longer；　the
  machine　refuses　to　act。　　I　am　in　great　want　of　rest；　and　of　a　long
  rest。　If　you　add　all　the　perplexities　that　besiege　an　author
  towards　the　end　of　his　work；　you　will　be　able　to　imagine　a　very
  wretched　life。　　I　could　not　go　on　with　my　task　if　it　were　not　for
  the　refreshing　calm　of　Marie's　companionship。　　It　would　be
  impossible　to　find　a　disposition　forming　a　happier　contrast　to　my
  own。　　In　my　perpetual　irritability　of　body　and　mind；　she　is　a
  providential　resource　that　never　fails　me。〃　（13）
  M。　Guizot　was；　in　like　manner；　sustained　and　encouraged；　amidst
  his　many　vicissitudes　and　disappointments；　by　his　noble　wife。　　If
  he　was　treated　with　harshness　by　his　political　enemies；　his
  consolation　was　in　the　tender　affection　which　filled　his　home　with
  sunshine。　　Though　his　public　life　was　bracing　and　stimulating；　he
  felt；　nevertheless；　that　it　was　cold　and　calculating；　and　neither
  filled　the　soul　nor　elevated　the　character。　　〃Man　longs　for　a
  happiness；〃　he　says　in　his　'Memoires；'　more　complete　and　more
  tender　than　that　which　all　the　labours　and　triumphs　of　active
  exertion　and　public　importance　can　bestow。　　What　I　know　to…day；　at
  the　end　of　my　race；　I　have　felt　when　it　began；　and　during　its
  continuance。　　Eve